15yr old boy 28 yr old woman
same old story except the 15yr old is mine and the 28yr old is a gal down the road ,,,What a mess ,,my wife has not found out yet but I will have to tell her tonight ,,on top of it all the womans ex-husband came to the house to tell me about it,,then his pastor from the local were better than you church came by to pray about it,,after hearing the preacher talking bad about my son I asked him to leave ,,he refused ,,,I made him leave in a not real nice way,,I did not hit him but I let him know I would if needed ,,then I am outside putting disc brakes on the front of my van,,the preachers son flys up my driveway in his truck,,runs toward me and before he could hit me I reached inside my tool box and smacked him upside the head with a 18" pipe wrench,I put him in his truck and he leaves,,10 minutes later a city police shows up ,,I live 5.5 miles from town,,he tells me he is going to arrest me ,,about this time my wife comes home,,I tell her to call the sheriff's office and I tell the town cop I am not going with him,,while my wife is on the phone with them the city cop pulls his sidearm and threatens me if I do not go with him,,I just sit down in the yard ,,my wife has her cell phone on speaker and the whole thing is recorded by the sheriffs office,,,deputy gets there,,wants to know whats up,,I tell him the story about the preacher and his son,,he asked the city cop why he is there and who filled the complaint,,,find out there is no complaint filed,,city cop also goes to the same we are better than you church,,,I go with the deputy but it is not to be arrested,,it is to file a complaint against them all including the city cop who threatened me with his sidearm and me unarmed . and yes the sheriffs office has it all on tape..city cop arrested,,preachers son arrested,,,I still have to explain to my wife what started it all....ANYONE HAVE A GOOD WAY TO TELL A WOMAN HER 15YR OLD HAS BEEN BANGING THE OLDER WOMAN DOWN THE ROAD [V]
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quote:Originally posted by dcinffxva
Just for the sake of argument, how many of you with 15 year old daughters feel like offering them up to some older guys ? Is 28 too old ? What about 48 ? Is one adult having sex with your minor child OK while another isn't ?
What if your 15 year old son was having an affair with the 28 year old GUY down the street ?
Think mom or dad would give them a wink and a nod ?
Best of luck to you Sharpshooter
Men and Women are wired differently ... the effects are totally different.
On the other hand ... 12-15 year old girls having babies isn't exactly unheard of either.
That being said, the woman should have used better judgement.0 -
If it was a 28 yr. old man and someone's 15 yr. old daughter, you can bet the responses would be more along the lines of "HANG THE SUMB!TCH"!
15 and 16 yr.old tramps have been lining up for decades to get boinked by the "handsome", "cool" older guy down the street.
Still, people seem to think that the 15 yr. old girl is the "victim" and the 15 yr. old boy is the "victor".
The woman needs to know that she is guilty of statuatory rape and that if she doesn't terminate the relationship, she will be charged.
The preacher and town cop are probably guilty of a crime as well if they had knowledge of HER crime and didn't act upon that knowledge.0 -
I see nothign wrong with this. As many have voiced before, where were these girls when i was 15? 0 -
Had a thing (can't call it an affair) with a married thirty year old, who lived 2 houses down when I was 16.
It was never discussed, but I'm almost certain that my folks knew about it. We all called her "crazy Mary".
A couple of months later, I enlisted in the Army.
It was enormously exciting for me, but I think it was routine for her. Her husband was a BUFF driver, and always deployed.
Doug
Why do we admit stuff like this to complete strangers ?? Is it bragging, or what ??
D.0 -
I had the same kind of arrangement at 16 with a 24 Year old woman. Lasted about two years until I went in the Navy.
She taught me more than anyone ever has and I believe all boys should have a Maggie Mae to prepair them for life.
I know my training is why I've never had a problem seducing women. No brag, just fact (courtesy of Will Sonnet).[}:)][:p]0 -
It sounds like things are taking a turn for the better. I don't envy your place in this. I'm sure you'll remind your son that he is lucky to still have his skin. The 'exposure' could have turned out a whole lot worse. Hopefully the lesson about 'dipping' into a married situation will stay with him, forever. I made the mistake only once, myself, at age 19. Hubby visited me at work and wanted details about every 'meet'. Turned out, in my case, it was a 'thrill' for the husband to listen to the details, but scared the cr@p out of me, for how it COULD have turned out.
It would not surprise me if some of the other 'players' (city cop, preachers son?) are somehow involved there, too. Tell you son to watch his flanks and stay away from them all. I like the idea of having you son explain the whole thing to your wife. It will leave a permenant impression on him. Good luck0 -
The preacher passing the word to the congregation just speeds up the process a little. It won't really make any difference. With that many people knowing about it already, you can count on everybody in three counties knowing about it by Monday.
You have my sympathy. I'm sorry you and the family have to go through this. GOOD LUCK.0 -
Sounds like your handling it wisely. Way to go. I hope your family does have someone you can trust to talk to as you go through this crisis.
I do wonder about this preacher and his son. Unfortunately, this is an example where you cannot expect different behavior from people who claim a moral position. They are human and do fail also. There could be a connection between them and the woman also. They could be doing damage control for there own reasons. Why would the son come to you...
I don't mean to sound ignorant, but this sort of thing probably legal in some state. Don't know about the laws in your state, but there might not be much you can do if you desired prosecution.
About fifteen years ago friends of mine was working on a hog farm in Kentucky. Breckenridge County I think. They showed me the rule book for the county fair that also had a beauty pageant. Rule #1 was the girl must be between the are 13 and 14. Rule #2 was single and never married.
We were at a tractor pull. They pointed to a couple sitting a little ways away and said he's 25 and she's in eight grade.0 -
I think you are going to be a rich man when you get this story all down on paper and sell the rights to the studios!!
Where is ZipperZap when we really need him! He can get you a deal!
I truly hope it all settles out ok for you and your family. All jokes aside, this stuff is stressfull and can have a bad ending if not handled carefully.0 -
Sharps
I agree with NORD...100%0 -
it sounds like most people here approval if a 15 yr old boy having a sexual relationship with an older women. how many of you would feel the same way about your 15 yr old son having a sexual relationship with a 28 yr old MAN ? 0 -
I suppose you've had more than enough "advice.." However I have a comment.
There are laws dealing with such things. The law says the woman, being an adult, is the responsible party. It's called "Statuatory Rape." (however you spell it).
I was once a teenager myself, and my fantasies revolved around an older woman, a teacher. However, that didn't make me a responsible person, since I was a minor.
Any way you look at it, the woman was the responsible party, and is vulnerable to being sued, even being sentenced to a prison term.
My advice is "do as you like." But don't take any crap from her, her husband, or the local so called law enforcement community. You have the upper hand, use it as you like.0 -
Men are smarter.........[:D] 0 -
I have read the post and I guess I need to clear up a couple things,,she is no longer married,,they have been divorced a little over a year,her ex just will not accept the divorce,he says its against his religion,,the pastors son got involved because he came to my house with the intention of whipping my ass because of me making his father leave my house,,I did not lay a hand on the pastor but I did get a little forceful in my making him leave after he refused to go,,his son wanted revenge,,the local cops have been great,,city and county except for the one bad one that came to the house after me,,he came because he is a member of the same church and the pastor called him and told him how I removed him from my house and then smacked his son. 0 -
you could always try to sell your story to the Media... 0 -
Uh ooh. Hope the girl and the mother never run into eachother at the grocery store or this story will take another turn for the worst! [:0]
From my perspective, I'm not really that worked up over it. If you're makin him into any type of man at all, he's not going to be psychologically damaged for life or anything. It's going to be best to just try to get over this debacle and move on with your lives. I would not go after the girl at this point. She's probably been through hell as it is, but I would put an end to it.
A 15 year old girl is a completely different story. This debate comes up every time. In that case, many times they are expecting love and security from an older man and eventually it goes away. In this situation, I believe there can be some psychological damage for life. Not every girl but I'd bet more often than not.
Just my .02 cents.0 -
would it be possible to get a picture of the 28 yr old woman ? 0 -
tune in at 8 for more of the life and times of [:D][:D][:D][:D][:D]
really man I sorry that all this is happing to ya but it sounds like you got your head on your should and dealing with it right.
tazz0 -
quote:Originally posted by newtgingrich
would it be possible to get a picture of the 28 yr old woman ?
Sure, I just happen to have one.
Y
[:p][}:)]0 -
quote:Originally posted by p3skyking
quote:Originally posted by newtgingrich
would it be possible to get a picture of the 28 yr old woman ?
Sure, I just happen to have one.
[:p][}:)]
She looks a little "miffed" you took her pic skyking .[}:)]
SxS0 -
The least of my worries would be for my son and the lady. Sounds like the preacher and his flock are to be concerned about. Unless ex-husband has evidence of this affair, I would deny everything. I would go after the preacher, the son, and the cop who was out of his jurisdiction. Nobody pulls a gun on me and gets away with it.
Maybe run into the preacher one day and get a good indication of his sense of self preservation. He probably enjoys the standing he has with his flock. I'm sure he would hate to lose that feeling of power......or the abitlity to breathe.0 -
Good luck!
Thats all I can offer.0 -
I will hold my comments for ...say...about 10 years.
I've got 2 teenage sons myself to try to keep track of.
Actually, I will comment that there seems to be a double standard for the opposite sexes in these kinds of matters.
In Michigan, criminal sexual conduct can be charged for any adult (or even juvenile, in some cases) for having sex with a person under 16, with or without consent.
I would seriously suggest not discussing the matter (in any detail) with anyone except an attorney or you may have to drag your son through a criminal trial, which maybe neither of you will want to do. An attorney, paid for by you, will have YOUR Family's best interest in mind, not those of the local community.0 -
quote:Originally posted by sharpshooter039
I have read the post and I guess I need to clear up a couple things,,she is no longer married,,they have been divorced a little over a year,her ex just will not accept the divorce,he says its against his religion,,the pastors son got involved because he came to my house with the intention of whipping my ass because of me making his father leave my house,,I did not lay a hand on the pastor but I did get a little forceful in my making him leave after he refused to go,,his son wanted revenge,,the local cops have been great,,city and county except for the one bad one that came to the house after me,,he came because he is a member of the same church and the pastor called him and told him how I removed him from my house and then smacked his son.
This is open and public knowledge of a woman having sex with a teen in your County. Will the local County prosecutor file charges on her without you filing a complaint?
Is the preacher looking for a slander suit against him?
Let mom handle the 15 year old son; she has the instincts to make the punishment fit the crime.0 -
quote:Originally posted by bpost1958
Let mom handle the 15 year old son; she has the instincts to make the punishment fit the crime.
What crime? "Hey mom, I'm not a homosexual"!
Hard to be angry at a son that one day will make her a grandma![}:)][:p]0 -
quote:Originally posted by nord
Religion aside...
She's 28 and lonely. He's 15 and has more hormones flowing then is safe for a body. In a way I can't blame either of them, and in a way it's both their fault.
You could say that she's old enough to know better. It's true, but your son knows better too. He's just as responsible as anyone for the visit you got tonight.
She raped him? I don't think so. That's just not fair as we both know that under different circumstances a "relationship" such as this would get by with a wink. Absolutely immoral... But inside you sort of envy the kid don't you?
So... If it were I, I'd have a long serious talk with my youngster. He needs to understand what kind of position he placed you in because his big brain was too fogged to think. He'd be under house arrest for the time being. Maybe for a long time being.
I'd also have a talk with the "woman". Not mean, not loud, and no blame... Just a polite conversation where you explain the same things to her that you explained to your son.
I'd end the conversation by sharing that any further contact between the two of them will result in your having to file charges... Not because you're being vindictive, not because you're mean, but because it's your duty as a parent to see that this kind of behavior cannot and will not be tolerated.
Not because of the sex really, not because it's immoral (though it is), but because this is the type of behavior that leads to nothing but a bad outcome for a lot of innocent folks. You and your wife included. The preacher, his son and his family, too! All because two careless people couldn't keep their pants on. And your son was one of the two!
What a mess. I'm really sorry.
Yes she raped him it is not possible for a 15 yr old to give legal consent so yes she raped him. Turn it around make it a 15 year old girl and a 28 yr old man and there would be no question about it. The law is clear0 -
quote:Just a thought... I think you need to be CERTAIN that it happened.
Doug is right.be sure it happen.0 -
If I were you, I'd call the police chief, and say that they have a choice. The whole situation can stay a private matter, or the whole situation can become public. If it becomes public, you will be out for the cop, the husband, the kid, and the preacher.
Ben0 -
quote:Originally posted by p3skyking
quote:Originally posted by bpost1958
Let mom handle the 15 year old son; she has the instincts to make the punishment fit the crime.
What crime? "Hey mom, I'm not a homosexual"!
Hard to be angry at a son that one day will make her a grandma![}:)][:p]
My thoughts exactly! [:D]0 -
Wipala -
Rape by the letter of the law... That's true.
But rape by its true meaning... Not a chance! Not when the young man voluntarily arrived at her door. Not when the young man invented excuses to be with her.
Let's not start with the legal age of majority or just where the line is drawn about age of consent. This isn't where the kid emerges from the encounter(s) physically battered and mentally broken for life. Though after Mom gets through he might be.
And just what about a 15 year old girl and a 28 year old man? Do you for a moment think that just because the law says the girl can't legally consent to sex that she can't or won't? Sorry, but I disagree. Fifteen year old girls often know a lot more about sex than boys.
Do you honestly think a normal male has much of a chance when a sexually mature female decides he's the one? If so, then you live in a different world than I do. Males don't fare well when females put on the full court press. I don't care how moral a male is, the chances of his being able to say no are slim at best.
The defining measure here is violence or force. If either is used by one party or the other, then it's most certainly rape! No different for a 15 year old boy or girl. If it's by mutual consent, then there's no actual rape even though the act may be unlawful.
We could go into STD's. We could ask the pregnancy question. We could preach morals. We could discuss the technicalities of law. We could... But these questions weren't asked.
Two people, both who knew better, placed themselves and others in negative situations in exchange for a few minutes of pleasure. As I said before, the sex is probably the least worrisome of all the problems caused by their actions. I'd guess at that level neither hurt the other.
The hurt is at the social and family level. The hurt could well extend to a number of mostly innocent folks who should have never had to deal with a situation like this. This is where a 15 year old boy (or girl) must come to know that should they decide to act as an adult, then they must be ready to face the consequences as an adult.
We've beat the subject nearly to death. We can all observe and pontificate on what should be or could be. We know what the law says. And it's all great theory as long as it remains theory. Human nature being what it is pretty much negates theory and leaves us to decide what the best course will be in dealing with what's happened.
I would be the first to agree that it would have been best has this never happened. I'll also assure you that should it have been that it was my 15 year old (boy or girl) there would have been no "wink" and acceptance on my part.0
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