Tax refund.....help
Every year for eight years my wife has gotten the tax refund money to with as she wishes. This was not the agreement when we got married. It was supposed to be hers one year and mine the next. But she has gotten it every stinking year. She even got it for the time we were divorced (we conveniently got back together just before tax time).
This year she plans on paying off some credit cards and she spent about $200 on new rugs (this women has spent over $7000 on new rugs and flooring for two houses since we've been married) when she just got new rugs before Christmas. So I mentioned that if I had $200 I could get a new rifle like my friends Yugo SKS. She said that I couldn't have any money. Any of my hard earned money. WTH it's my money.
Last night she changes her mind (sort of) and says I can $200 but I can't spend it on guns. The problem is that I'm Exactly $200 short of what I need to get another AR kit. If I get the money I know what I'll do and she will probably want to see what I spent it on (no that it's any her business).
OK after the back story I need a way to convince or at least talk her into letting me buy a gun. She is pretty anti gun but she doesn't mind me having a few and we have an agreement that I can have my guns as long as I keep them out of her sight. So I figure I can pull this off if I can talk her into letting spend the cash on a gun.
Any help or ideas would be greatly appreciated.
This year she plans on paying off some credit cards and she spent about $200 on new rugs (this women has spent over $7000 on new rugs and flooring for two houses since we've been married) when she just got new rugs before Christmas. So I mentioned that if I had $200 I could get a new rifle like my friends Yugo SKS. She said that I couldn't have any money. Any of my hard earned money. WTH it's my money.
Last night she changes her mind (sort of) and says I can $200 but I can't spend it on guns. The problem is that I'm Exactly $200 short of what I need to get another AR kit. If I get the money I know what I'll do and she will probably want to see what I spent it on (no that it's any her business).
OK after the back story I need a way to convince or at least talk her into letting me buy a gun. She is pretty anti gun but she doesn't mind me having a few and we have an agreement that I can have my guns as long as I keep them out of her sight. So I figure I can pull this off if I can talk her into letting spend the cash on a gun.
Any help or ideas would be greatly appreciated.
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She sounds like a control freak, to be honest. I "control" the finances in my house (I pay the bills, etc.), but the wife has credit cards and can access the checkbook from my desk drawer whenever she wants. My request to her is any "big" purchases, let's just talk about it first to make sure we're both not making "big" purchases at the same time.
When we get our tax refunds, they simply go into our checking account. If they're huge (like last year and this year will be), we talk about if we should simply save the money or if we should get something that we need but wouldn't normally spend money on.
Last year, I got a gun owner's manual* and she spent some money on clothes, and we both put a majority of it in the bank.
*I don't own guns. Guns are evil and have minds of their own. They spray bullets everywhere, even when completely unloaded and left alone on the kitchen counter. Nobody should have guns, but it is okay to live vicariously through the ownership of owner manuals.0 -
Sounds like you need to grow a set man. You were rid of her once. I'd put a boot in her azz. 0 -
I think staying divorced was an alternative that you should have considered, unless you enjoy her "foot in your neck." [:D][:D] Seriously, I am from the "old school." I do not ask permission to do what I do with my money. I make. I spend it. I spend a lot on her, but that is my decision. Sorry, I am no help to you. (PS -- I am divorced and plan to stay that way) 0 -
quote:Originally posted by MT357
Sounds like you need to grow a set man. You were rid of her once. I'd put a boot in her azz.
I remarried her for revenge. It's great she has to see me everyday for the rest of her rest of her life now.[}:)]
But seriously I usually don't want or need to buy anything with the tax money. I just let her have it. But the one time I do she tries to make rules. This is BS. I just need to figure out how to do what I want without getting in a fight.0 -
Sounds like you have bigger issues than how to come up with $200. But if she says you can't buy a gun then use it to buy parts. Parts aren't a gun.;) 0 -
quote:Originally posted by fastcarsgofast
quote:Originally posted by MT357
Sounds like you need to grow a set man. You were rid of her once. I'd put a boot in her azz.
I remarried her for revenge. It's great she has to see me everyday for the rest of her rest of her life now.[}:)]
But seriously I usually don't want or need to buy anything with the tax money. I just let her have it. But the one time I do she tries to make rules. This is BS. I just need to figure out how to do what I want without getting in a fight.
Okay. If you're into mind games, this is a lot easier.
Buy your gun or kit. Tell her you want to spend your $200 on groceries. End of story.0 -
I'd spend the tax refund on a divorce attorney. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by elkoholic
Sounds like you have bigger issues than how to come up with $200. But if she says you can't buy a gun then use it to buy parts. Parts aren't a gun.;)
But if I show her what I spent the money on then we fight. And they are stupid fights. I wouldn't mind if it a fight about something important.
I've already resolved myself to getting the parts kit. I just need t come up with a way to keep the peace.0 -
Don't file jointly, you'll get a check for you and she'll get a check for her.
And then maybe think about divorcing her again?0 -
...wow, she "lets" you have some guns just keep them out of her sight [:0]
I'd tell her I was anti-rug, and to keep the damn things out of my sight; which would not be too hard as I would give her the rugs in the divorce decree...[;)]
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quote:Originally posted by Dave W.
I'd spend the tax refund on a divorce attorney.
Divorce really isn't an option. We have three kids, I love her, took a vow in front of God, and this is the only issue we really have ( I like guns and she don't).0 -
I guess the pants in your house don't come in mens sizes. Sorry. I don't know what to tell ya. Fortunately my wife is a scrooge when it comes to money. Our tax refunds or any other extra money either goes in savings or to pay off credit cards. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by ljwrench
I guess the pants in your house don't come in mens sizes. Sorry. I don't know what to tell ya. Fortunately my wife is a scrooge when it comes to money. Our tax refunds or any other extra money either goes in savings or to pay off credit cards.
ROTFLMAO... that's sweet (sorry, I like the wording of this insult)0 -
quote:Originally posted by fastcarsgofast
quote:Originally posted by Dave W.
I'd spend the tax refund on a divorce attorney.
Divorce really isn't an option. We have three kids, I love her, took a vow in front of God, and this is the only issue we really have ( I like guns and she don't).
Actually I like the idea of telling her you don't like rugs and to keep them out of your sight.
Of course, you may never have sex again, at least not with the lights on... (sorry, BAD pun)0 -
What I'm looking for is a way to get permission. I can always get forgiveness later. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by spanielsells
quote:Originally posted by fastcarsgofast
quote:Originally posted by Dave W.
I'd spend the tax refund on a divorce attorney.
Divorce really isn't an option. We have three kids, I love her, took a vow in front of God, and this is the only issue we really have ( I like guns and she don't).
Actually I like the idea of telling her you don't like rugs and to keep them out of your sight.
Of course, you may never have sex again, at least not with the lights on... (sorry, BAD pun)
Sex, with kids in the house. What's this sex thing of witch you speak?[:p]0 -
quote:Originally posted by fastcarsgofast
What I'm looking for is a way to get permission. I can always get forgiveness later.
PERMISSION?
Fine. Give her a choice:
Honey, I want $200. I want two things, and I'll spend it on the one that you choose:
1. $200 for the parts to my gun kit
2. $200 to shove down a stripper's g-string.
Go ahead, make the choice.
PERMISSION? ARE YOU INSANE?0 -
quote:Originally posted by fastcarsgofast
quote:Originally posted by spanielsells
quote:Originally posted by fastcarsgofast
quote:Originally posted by Dave W.
I'd spend the tax refund on a divorce attorney.
Divorce really isn't an option. We have three kids, I love her, took a vow in front of God, and this is the only issue we really have ( I like guns and she don't).
Actually I like the idea of telling her you don't like rugs and to keep them out of your sight.
Of course, you may never have sex again, at least not with the lights on... (sorry, BAD pun)
Sex, with kids in the house. What's this sex thing of witch you speak?[:p]
Which is Reason #363 why my wife and I only have four-legged kids.0 -
This is quite entertaining but I have to go take care of some stuff right now. I'll be back later to see how much more my manhood has been insulted. Hopefuly when I come back one of the ladies will have chimed in with some good advice.
And don't hold back guys I can take it. I'm not gonna cry or get my feelings all hurt. I just thinks it's funny.0 -
I don't have any good advice but my wife tried to do the same thing about two years after we were married. The first two years were ok but then she started in on the gun thing. I straight up told her "this is my life not yours" and I'm to dam old for somebody to tell me what to do. She can do what she wants to do and I do what I want to do and we still meet in the middle..period. Been ok ever since..goin on 13 years..Bull 0 -
Buy what you want. Thats the way it should be within reason. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by fastcarsgofast
This is quite entertaining but I have to go take care of some stuff right now. I'll be back later to see how much more my manhood has been insulted. Hopefuly when I come back one of the ladies will have chimed in with some good advice.
And don't hold back guys I can take it. I'm not gonna cry or get my feelings all hurt. I just thinks it's funny.
There are deeper troubles in your marriage then "how to spend a couple hundred dollars"
See a marriage counseler PRONTO.
Or
It's always easier to ask for forgiveness than asking permission in the first place.
Good luck.
Troubles like this, I see no humor in. Perhaps that is where your marriage is troubled......Just an observation from the outside looking in....0 -
Sounds like getting permission is out of the question especially if you have already had a "fight" about it. Do you own enough guns to play the "gun shell game"?
****note to the unmarried guys here****
Buy lots of guns before you get married and don't ever talk to your wife about the guns you want!! That way guns can come and go and she'll never know.0 -
Permission to spend the money you earn? Sorry that this will be another post bashing your manhood. You had it right with the divorce. Now go buy a pair and stand up to her. Bet she leaves if you do. 0 -
I just feel sorry for the kids.If they are boys they will grow up thinking its ok to be a henpecked wuss of a husband,and if they are girls they will grow up in several failed relationships because they wont be able to find anybody to put up with their controling ways.(unless they marry a liberal)[:D] 0 -
OK dude You are what is known as a wuss. And now for the bad news... WE CAN'T HELP YOU...
There is hope though, cause you can help yourself....
Tonite walk right up to her and say I am getting a gun and if you don't like it there is the door. I've been more than fair and this year it is my turn.. And we from this year forth are keeping that every other year agreement. Like it hate it that is the way it is...
She may leave, but you'll have taken care of that wuss moniker...0 -
My wife just spent 1/2 of our return on 10 cord of "work for the hubby" IE: a semi load of firewood that I need to cut & split. She'll be spending some getting ahead on a couple of bills, and the rest she's setting aside for MY trip to a cartridge show.[:D]
Sounds like you have some serious money issues to deal with with your wife.0 -
Just wondering.
Does she work outside the house? Full time, part time?
If so, what percentage of the total income does she make?
Who does the dishes?
The laundry, folds and puts the clothes away?
Cooks, cleans, grocery shopping?0 -
Repeat after me:
"I am a man. I want to be fair to my wife and honest with the world, but I deserve the same in return. This is money I earned. I have been generous with my wife, but I have short changed myself. This will change now. I will buy my gun. I won't be mean or nasty, but I will buy my gun with my money. If my wife is a decent, loving, fair and honest human being, she will understand and accept that. If she loves me, she will be happy for me and take pleasure in my happiness. If she doesn't, then there is no reason it should matter to me WHAT she thinks. I am a man. I am a man.I am a man."0 -
quote:Originally posted by oldgunner
Repeat after me:
"I am a man. I want to be fair to my wife and honest with the world, but I deserve the same in return. This is money I earned. I have been generous with my wife, but I have short changed myself. This will change now. I will buy my gun. I won't be mean or nasty, but I will buy my gun with my money. If my wife is a decent, loving, fair and honest human being, she will understand and accept that. If she loves me, she will be happy for me and take pleasure in my happiness. If she doesn't, then there is no reason it should matter to me WHAT she thinks. I am a man. I am a man.I am a man."
Does it come with that special Whopper that BK Steakhouse is advertising?0
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