Joke Of The Day
Garfield has it right!
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I saw a Radical Muslim fall into the icy Columbia River this morning about 8:20.
As a responsible citizen, I informed the local office of emergency services.
It's now 6:00 PM and they still haven't responded!
I'm starting to think I've wasted a stamp.0 -
The help button listed on Gunbroker.com [?][:D] 0 -
Bud and Jim were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as aircraft mechanics in PITTSBURGH.
One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.
Bud said, "Man, I wish we had something to drink!" Jim says, "Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz. You wanna try it?"
So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane hootch and got completely smashed.
The next morning Bud wakes up and is surprised at how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover!
NO bad side effects. Nothing!
Then the phone rings. It's Jim. Jim says, "Hey, how do you feel this morning?"
Bud says, "I feel great. How about you?"
Jim says, "I feel great, too. You don't have a hangover?"
Bud says, "No that jet fuel is great stuff -- no hangover, nothing. We ought to do this more often."
"Yeah, well there's just one thing."
"What's that?"
"Have you farted yet?"
"No "
"Well, DON'T, 'cause I'm in Denver0 -
A REDNECK FROM GEORGIA
DECIDES TO TRAVEL ACROSS THE SOUTH TO VIRGINIA TO SEE GOD'S COUNTRY.
WHEN HE GETS TO FRANKLIN, HE LIKES THE PLACE SO MUCH THAT HE DECIDES
TO STAY. BUT FIRST HE MUST FIND A JOB.!
HE WALKS INTO THE INTERNATIONAL PAPER COMPANY OFFICE AND FILLS OUT AN
APPLICATION AS AN EXPERIENCED LOG INSPECTOR.
IT'S HIS LUCKY DAY!!! THEY JUST HAPPEN TO BE LOOKING FOR SOMEONE, BUT
FIRST, THE LOG FOREMAN TAKES HIM FOR A RIDE INTO THE FOREST IN THE
COMPANY PICKUP TRUCK TO SEE HOW MUCH HE KNOWS.
THE FOREMAN STOPS THE TRUCK ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD AND POINTS AT A
TREE. "SEE THAT TREE OVER THERE? I WANT YOU TO TELL ME WHAT SPECIES
IT IS AND HOW MANY BOARD FEET OF LUMBER IT CONTAINS."
THE REDNECK PROMPTLY ANSWERS, "THAT THAR'S A WHITEPINE, 383 BOARD
FEET OF LUMBER IN 'ER."
THE FOREMAN IS IMPRESSED!!! HE PUTS THE TRUCK IN MOTION AND STOPS
ABOUT A MILE DOWN THE ROAD. HE POINTS AT ANOTHER TREE THROUGH THE
PASSENGER WINDOW AND ASKS THE SAME QUESTION. THIS TIME, IT'S A
BIGGER TREE OF A DIFFERENT CLASS.
THAT'S A LOBLOLLY PINE AND SHE'S GOT ABOUT 456 CLEAR BOARD FEET.
THE FOREMAN IS REALLY IMPRESSED WITH THE GOOD OL' BOY, HE HAS BEEN
QUICK AND GOT THE ANSWERS RIGHT WITHOUT USING A CALCULATOR.
ONE MORE test. THEY DRIVE A LITTLE FURTHER DOWN THE ROAD, AND THE
FOREMAN STOPS AGAIN. THIS TIME, HE POINTS ACROSS THE ROAD THROUGH HIS
DRIVER SIDE WINDOW AND SAYS, "AND WHAT ABOUT THAT ONE?"
BEFORE THE FOREMAN FINISHES POINTING, THE REDNECK SAYS, "WHITE OAK,
242 BOARD FEET AT BEST"
THE FOREMAN SPINS THE TRUCK AROUND AND HEADS BACK TO THE OFFICE A
LITTLE TICKED OFF BECAUSE HE THINKS THE RED NECK IS SMARTER THAN HE
IS.
AS THEY NEAR THE OFFICE, THE FOREMAN STOPS THE TRUCK AND ASKS BUBBA
TO STEP OUTSIDE. HE HANDS HIM A PIECE OF CHALK AND TELLS HIM, "SEE
THAT TREE OVER THERE?" I WANT YOU TO MARK AN X ON THE FRONT OF THAT
TREE.
THE FOREMAN THINKS TO HIMSELF, "IDIOT, HOW WOULD HE KNOW WHICH IS
THE FRONT OF THE TREE?"
WHEN BUBBA REACHES THE TREE, HE GOES AROUND IT IN A CIRCLE WHILE
LOOKING AT THE GROUND. HE THEN REACHES UP AND PLACES A WHITE X ON
THE TRUNK.
HE WALKS BACK TO THE FOREMAN AND HANDS HIM THE CHALK. "THAT THAR'S
THE FRONT", THE REDNECK SAYS.
THE FOREMAN LAUGHS TO HIMSELF AND ASKS SARCASTICALLY, "HOW IN THE
HELL DO YOU KNOW THAT'S THE FRONT OF THE TREE?"
THE GOOD OL' BOY LOOKS DOWN AT HIS FEET, WHILE RUBBING THE TOE OF HIS
LEFT BOOT CLEANING IT IN THE GRAVEL AND REPLIES, "CUZ SOMEBODY TOOK A
poop BEHIND IT."
HE GOT THE JOB AND IS NOW THE FOREMAN!!!!!
[:D][:D][:D]0 -
Short and Funny
I dialed a number and got the following recording:
"I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call.
I am making some changes in my life.
Please leave a message after the
beep. If I do not return your call,
you are one of the changes."
~~~~~
At pilot training back in the
Air Corps they taught us,
"Always try to keep the number
of landings you make
equal to the number of take
offs you make."
~~~~~
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
~~~~~
My wife and I had words,
but I didn't get to use mine.
~~~~~
Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.
~~~~~
Blessed are those who can give without remembering
and take without forgetting.
~~~~~
The irony of life is that, by the time
you're old enough to know your way
around, you're not going anywhere.
~~~~~
God made man before woman so as to give him time to think
of an answer for her first question.
~~~~~
I was always taught to respect my elders,
but it keeps getting harder to find one.
~~~~~
Every morning is the dawn
of a new error.0 -
A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the Priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favor?"
"Of course. What may I do for you?"
"Well, I bought an expensive electronic hair dryer that is well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there anyway you could carry it through customs for me? Under your robe perhaps?"
"I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie."
"With your honest face, Father, no one will question you."
When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her. The official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?"
"From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare."
The official thought the answer was strange, so asked, "And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"
"I have a marvelous little instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused."
Roaring with laughter, the official said, "Go ahead, Father.0 -
Two hillbillies Ed and Red walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation.
Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, "Kin ya swallar?"
The woman shakes her head no.
"Kin ya breathe?"
The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.
His partner says, "Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver', but I ain't never seen nobody do it!"0 -
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Redneck Coroner...
Three smiling corpses are lying in a morgue in Alabama, and a detective goes into the coroner's to find the causes of death. The coroner points to the first dead man.
"This is Cletus," he says. "He died of shock after winning $20 million on the lottery."
He then moves on to the second smiling corpse. "This is Bo," the coroner says with a grin. "He died having a 'good time' with Trudy-May."
Finally he moves on to the last smiling corpse. "This is Roscoe," says the coroner. "He died after being struck by lightning."
"Well," asks the detective, "Why in heck was the fool smiling?"
"Oh," says the coroner. "He thought he was having his picture taken."
[:D]
Jeff0 -
Here's a good old story about a good old boy from Texas:
Seems a guy cruises through a stop sign, or whatever, and gets pulled over by a local policeman.
Guy hands the cop his driver's license, insurance verification, plus his (CCW ~ Concealed Carry Weapons) permit.
"Okay, Mr. Smith," the cop says, "I see your CCW permit. Are you carrying today?"
"Yes, I am."
"Well then, better tell me what you got."
Smith says, "Well, I got a .357 revolver in my inside coat pocket. There's a 9mm semi-auto in the glove box.
And, I've got a .22 magnum derringer in my right boot."
"Okay," the cop says. "Anything else?"
"Yeah, back in the trunk, there's an AR15 and a shotgun. That's about it."
"Mr. Smith, are you on your way to or from a gun range?"
"Nope."
"Well then, what are you afraid of?"
Not a dam thing0 -
Living Will
Last night, my wife and I were sitting
in the living room talking about many things.
The idea of a living will came up and I said
to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative
state, dependent on some machine and fluids
from a bottle. If I ever come to that just
pull the plug."
She got up, unplugged the TV and then
threw out my beer.
Bitch.....0 -
A man tells his wife that he's going out to buy cigarettes. When he gets to the store he finds out it's closed. So the guy ends up going to the bar to use the vending machine. While there, he has a few beers and begins talking to this beautiful girl. He has a few more beer and the next thing he knows he's in this girl's apartment and having quite a pleasurable time. The next thing he know it was 3:00 AM.
"Oh my, god, my wife is going to kill me!" he exclaimed. "Quick give me some talcum powder!"
She gets him some and he rubs it all over his hands. When he got home his wife is up waiting for him and she's furious. "Where the hell have you been!"
He says, "Well to tell you the truth, I went into a bar, had a few drinks, went home with this blonde and I slept with her." "Let me see your hands!" she demands. He shows his wife his powdery hands.
"Damn liar, you were out bowling again!"0 -
A photographer from a well-known national magazine was assigned to cover Southern California's wildfires. The magazine wanted pictures of the heroic work the fire fighters were doing as they battled the blazes. When the photographer arrived on the scene he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede, or even make impossible, his obtaining good photographs from ground-level. He requested permission from his boss to rent a plane and take photos from the air. His request was approved, and via a cell phone call to the local county airport, necessary arrangements were made. He was told a single-engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport. He arrived at the airfield and spotted a plane warming up outside a hangar.
He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, "Let's go!" The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind, and roared down the runway. Within just a minute or two of his arrival they were in the air.
The photographer requested the pilot to, "Fly over the valley and
make two or three low passes so I can take some pictures of the fires on the hillsides."
"Why?" asked the pilot.
"Because I'm a photographer for a national magazine," he responded, "and I need to get some close-up shots."
The pilot was strangely silent for a moment; finally he stammered,
"So, you're telling me you're not the flight instructor?"0 -
You may have seen this, it has been around for a while.
The Police Stop
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has
the following exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got
my 5th DUI.
Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I
saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting
my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and
killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the
trunk.
Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.
Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain.
The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain
approached the driver to handle the tense situation:
Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.
It was valid.
Captain: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration.
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can
see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told
you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem.
Trunk is opened; no body.
Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped
you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole
the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was
a dead body in the trunk.
Driver: Yeah, I'll bet he told you I was speeding, too.0 -
A mangy looking guy who goes into a bar and orders a drink.
The bartender says: "No way. I don't think you can pay for it."
The guy says, "You're right. I don't have any money, but if I show you something you haven't seen before, will you give me a drink?"
The bartender says, "Only if what you show me ain't risque."
"Deal!" says the guy and reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a hamster. He puts the hamster on the bar and it runs to the end of the bar, down the bar, across the room, up the piano, jumps on the key board and starts playing Gershwin songs. And the hamster is really good.
The bartender says, "You're right. I've never seen anything like that before. That hamster is truly good on the piano." The guy downs the drink and asks the bartender for another.
"Money or another miracle else no drink", says the bartender. The guy reaches into his coat again and pulls out a frog. He puts the frog on the bar, and the frog starts to sing. He has a marvelous voice and great pitch. A fine singer. A stranger from the other end of the bar runs over to the guy and offers him $300 for the frog.
The guy says "It's a deal." He takes the three hundred and gives the stranger the frog. The stranger runs out of the bar. The bartender says to the guy "Are you some kind of nut? You sold a singing frog for $300? It must have been worth millions. You must be crazy."
"Not so", says the guy. "The hamster is also a ventriloquist."0 -
Ed was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really MAD!!! She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE".
The next morning Ed got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a small box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Funeral services for Ed have been scheduled for Friday.0 -
An American wrestler was listening to his managers advice about his next match. The guys an Australian who has this lock hold that he calls a Kangaroo Hold. If he gets you in this hold youre screwed. It can not be broken. The manager demonstrated the hold and ways to block it.
The match started,and immediatly the American boy got locked in the hold The manager threw his hands over his eyes in utter dispair. Suddenly the crowd went wild. The manager looked up and saw the referee holding up the Americans hand in victory. Back in the getdressing room the manager said i did not see what happened. How did you break that hold?
Well the wrestler said he had me all twisted up and i looked up and saw this pair of balls hanging in front of my face so i bit them. Youd be suprised how strong you can get when you bite your own nuts.0 -
A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a San Francisco, CA
courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible.
The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him
more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When
the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy
cried out that they also beat him.
After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning
that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the
judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who
should have custody of him.
After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child
welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the San
Francisco 49ers, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.0 -
Post Turtle
While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old California rancher, whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.
Eventually the topic got around to Nancy Pelosi and her elevation to speaker of the house.
The old rancher said, "Well, ya know, Nancy is a post turtle."
Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a 'post turtle' was.
The old rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle." The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain. "You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up there, and you just want to help the dumb ass get down."0 -
In the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Netscape deal, here are the latest mergers we can expect to see:
Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Company merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace.
Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become Polly-Warner-Cracker.
3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood.
John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi.
Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become Zip Audi Do Da.
Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become Honey I'm Home.
Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become Mine, All Mine.
Knott's Berry Farm and the National Organization for Women merge to become Knott NOW.
Jeff0 -
In a local sports bar trivia quiz the other night, I lost by one point. The question was, where do women mostly have curly hair? Apparently, it's Africa.
One of the other questions was to name two things commonly found in cells. It appears that Mexicans and African Americans is not the correct answer.
I've heard that Apple has scrapped their plans for the new children's-oriented iPod after realizing that iTouch Kids is not a good product name.
A new Muslim clothing shop opened here in Sanford, but I've been banned from it after asking to look at some bomber jackets.
You can say lots of bad things about pedophiles but at least they drive slowly past schools.
A friend of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin. I asked, "How can you tell them apart?" He said, "Her brother has a mustache."
Just put a deposit down on a brand new Porsche and mentioned it on Face Book. I said, "I can't wait for the new 911 to arrive!" Next thing I know, 4000 Muslims have added me as a friend!!
Being a modest man, when I checked into my hotel on a recent trip, I said to the lady at the registration desk ... "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled." To which she replied, "No, it's regular porn, you sick buzzard."
The red cross knocked at my door asking if I could help towards the floods in Pakistan. I said I would love to, but my hose only reaches the bottom of the driveway.0 -
Three friends from the local congregation were asked, "When you're
in your casket, and friends and congregation members are mourning over
you,
what would you like them to say?"
Artie said: "I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a
fine spiritual leader, and a great family man."
Eugene commented: "I would like them to say I was a wonderful
teacher and servant of God who made a huge difference in people's
lives."
Al said: "I'd like them to say, "Look, he's moving!""[:D][:D][:D]0 -
You know the honeymoon is over when the comedians start.
>
> The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree . . . and think 25
> to life would be appropriate.
> --Jay Leno
>
> America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask.
> --Jay Leno
>
> Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal?
> A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.
> --Conan O'Brien
>
> Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
> A: A fund raiser.
> --Jay Leno
>
> Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?
> A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers, and threats to society. The
> other is for housing prisoners.
> --David Letterman
>
> Q: If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and
> it started to sink, who would be saved?
> A: America !
> --Jimmy Fallon
>
> Q: What's the difference between Obama and his dog, Bo?
> A: Bo has papers.
> --Jimmy Kimmel
>
> Q: What was the most positive result of the "Cash for Clunkers" program?
> A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road.
> --David Letterman0 -
Body Statistics
It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.
One human hair can support 3 kg (6 lb).
The average man's BallPark Frank is three times the length of his thumb.
Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.
A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
Women blink twice as often as men.
The average person's skin weighs twice as much as the brain.
Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are
standing still.
If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.
Women reading this will be finished now.
Men who read this are probably still busy checking their thumbs.0 -
I know a guy who lives in Pennsylvania and sorta has a beard.
He is Am ish0 -
No speaka da English:
A bus stops and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation.
The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:
'Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more!
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time.'
The lady can't take this any more,
'You foul-mouthed sex obsessed pig !' she retorted indignantly. 'In this country, we don't speak aloud in Public places about our sex lives!'
'Hey, coola down lady,' said the man. 'Who talkin' bouta sex? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spell 'Mississippi.'
$ 1.00 says you're gonna read this again.0 -
Wal-Mart announced that sometime in 2010 it will begin offering customers a new discount item...Walmart's own brand of wine.
The world's largest retail chain is rumored to be teaming up with Ernest & Julio Gallo Winery of California to produce the spirits at an affordable price in the $2 to $5 range.
Wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to put a bottle of the Wal-Mart brand into their shopping carts, but 'There is a market for inexpensive wine,' said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at University of Arkansas , Bentonville. 'However, branding will be very important.'
Customer surveys were conducted to determine the most attractive name for the Walmart wine brands and varieties.
The top surveyed names in order of popularity were:
10. Chateau Traileur Parc
9. White Trashfindel
8. Big Red Gulp
7. World Championship Riesling
6. NASCARbernet
5. Chef Boyardeaux
4. Peanut Noir
3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar
2. Grape Expectations
1. Nasti Spumante
The beauty of Walmart wine is that it can be served with either white meat (Possum) or red meat (Squirrel).
P.S. Don't bother responing back to tell me that this is a hoax. I know possum is not white meat.0 -
http://www.jsonline.com/news/state/nov05/373937.asp
The county nursing home is being downsized for lack of funds. What they going to do, shoot brats into space? Your tax dollars at work.....
joe0 -
Joke-O-The Day
Salesman of the Century
A young guy from Minnesota moved to Florida and goes to a big "everything
under one roof" department store looking for a job. The Manager says, "Do
you have any sales experience?" The kid says, "Yeah. I was a salesman
back in Minnesota."
Well, the boss liked the looks of the kid, so he gave him a job and said
"You start tomorrow, and I'll come down after we close and see how
you did."
His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it, and after the
store was locked up, the boss came down."How many customers bought
something from you on your first day? The kid says, "One."
The boss says, "Just One?" You know our sales people average on a
slow day 20 to 30 customers, but you had "JUST ONE". And how much
was your "JUST ONE for?"
The kid says, "$101,237.65". The boss said what?... "$101,237.65?
Well, what the heck did you sell?'' The kid says, "First, I sold him a
small fishhook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a
larger fishhook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where
he was going fishing, and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin engine "Chris Craft". Then he said he didn't think his "Honda Civic" would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that "4X4 Expedition."
The boss said, "A man came in here to buy a fishing hook and you sold
him a "BOAT and a TRUCK?""
No " the kid said, "The man came in to buy monthly hygiene products for his wife, And I
said, "Dude, your weekend's shot, you should go fishing".0 -
A young man goes into the Job Center in Jacksonville, Florida,
and sees a card advertising for a Gynecologist' s Assistant.
Interested, he goes to learn more - 'Can you give me some more
details?' he asks the clerk.
The clerk pulls up the file and says, 'The job entails getting the
ladies ready for the gynecologist. You have to help them out of
their underwear, lay them down and carefully wash their private
regions, then apply shaving foam and gently shave off the hair, then rub in
soothing oils so that they're ready for the gynecologist's examination.
There's an annual salary of $45,000, but you're going to have
to go to Oxford, Mississippi. That's about 620 miles from here.'
'Oh, is that where the job is?'
'No sir - that's where the end of the line is right now.'
[:D][:D][:D]0
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