This is bad
Using Firefox, went to photobucket. My home album displays for a second or two then goes to a white screen. I tried to contact them but the same thing happens, it shows for a second then goes to a white page
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Not much of a marriage. Dump them both and get a dog. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by mateomasfeo
Not much of a marriage. Dump them both and get a dog.
Amen.
You're just begging for trouble with this.
Listen, I just got married last October to someone I had been dating for 4 years. It's been 6 months now and nothing has changed from the way it was our first year together. Everything is very predictable, exactly the way I like it. When I come home, she's home. She's not fooling around, there's no BS. If I call her on her cell, she answers 99% of the time and lets me know why if she couldn't. If I get mad at her over anything, she gets very upset. We live together but we do our own things. We never fight or yell at eachother. We're involved with different things, but we don't do anything that would cause the other to become angry. Why? I don't know. It's just the way it is. It seems like an easy and preferable way to live.
This is what's normal to me now. Normal has a whole new definition. Believe me, it didn't use to be like this. It took me a while to recalibrate my thinking. Now I know. Now I'm a changed man and I would never go back. Soon after my first mistake, I adopted a zero tolerance policy. This one passed it for 4 years. Until you pass a zero tolerance policy, you're going to put up with BS all your life.
I certainly don't know all the details of your relationship but it leaves me wondering why you got married at all if you weren't both on the same page. It had to be obvious at some point prior.
There are many women out there that think they need to get married (for their own security) that will never be marriage material. By the time they get things figured out, they'll be replaced by the next round of eligible young women. Get over with it and find the 21 year old that has it figured out. The marriage is on the rocks.0 -
quote:Originally posted by catpealer111
I got the first two weeks off in May.
I'd go out to where ever she is and be my own private investigator. If you staked out the place for a day, it probably wouldn't be too hard to figure out what's going on. Take a camera with accurate time and/or date stamps on it and be ready to discover the truth. For all you know, she's found another woman!
This would solve so many questions. You'd have piece of mind again. You'd have pics, which would serve so many purposes. You could send her a few, proving her guilt. While you're at it, burn the bridge down and send a few to her parents. Save the rest for court.
I mean look to the future. Do you want to be going through this 5 years from now? If not, than there's not much of a point trying to make it last another day.
Wish I could be more optimistic for you but I know how these types work. Very selfish. Very self-centered.
My advice for this other is, tie up the first loose end you have before you do any damage to your case on your part. Then, do what you want, hopefully learning from your experience.0 -
quote:Originally posted by catpealer111
I've been talking to a female member of the species(who is not my wife) for a couple of weeks now. Only been conversing over the telephone, haven't met face to face. I've talked with her more in two weeks than I have with Renee in 4 months. WTH am I doing?
is it wrong to chat to a woman??
if this is cheeting....don't get caught chatting with some guy!!!!!![:0] [:D]0 -
quote:Originally posted by mond
quote:Originally posted by catpealer111
I've been talking to a female member of the species(who is not my wife) for a couple of weeks now. Only been conversing over the telephone, haven't met face to face. I've talked with her more in two weeks than I have with Renee in 4 months. WTH am I doing?
is it wrong to chat to a woman??
if this is cheeting....don't get caught chatting with some guy!!!!!![:0] [:D]
[:0][:0][:0][:0][:0][:0][:0][:D]0 -
alright,.....take it from someone who is in their second go-round of marriage counseling at $120/hr.
I have a job which allows me to be patronizing the local watering holes as well as to come and go with great freedom. I have been offered many things, many times, by quite a few VERY attractive ladies much younger than myself (AKA hotties with tight bodies etc etc etc). Some of these offers were purely for sport, no attachment. And I would be lying if I said I didn't like it,..as would any other person male or female,..that's just human nature.
Now figure in that during this time I felt it was only a matter of time before my marriage was over and I was simply hanging on long enough to see my kids every day until one of us finally ended it. So offers like these were quite attractive and I figured why be completely misearble until it finally tanked,.....right???? kinda what you are feeling/thinking right now,...right??? So when I got close to folding to the pressure, I realized something very profound (also a result of utilizing the wisdom of a counselor of my own),....that realization was that to be REALLY happy, and REALLY at peace psycologicaly, something had to be addressed and at least worked on diligently if not fixed/ended.
enter the marriage counselor. If both parties really deep down want it to work, there is a long term process ahead,..but as both parties work toward the needs of the other,..the tension can come off quite fast, and things can improve greatly. YOU MUST BOTH WANT IT, OR ELSE IT WILL BE A WASTE OF TIME AND POSSIBLY MAKE ONE OF YOU EVEN MORE RIGID AND/OR ANGRY.
If you deep down don't want it anymore, as scary and sad as it is, YOU MUST FIRST ADMIT IT TO YOURSELF, THEN TELL YOUR WIFE IN A MATURE MANNER THAT IT ISN'T THERE ANYMORE. That alone will free you emotionaly, and your confusion and mixed up thoughts will become much clearer. At this point, you are not doing anything wrong and can persue a relationship or even have the freedom to figure out that you have only found a friend, but are still free to find the person that does complete you.
make your decision, admit the truth to yourself, talk to your wife about it and find out what her deep down feeling is, then either work on it fervently or part ways in the most mature manner possible, which can possibly even result in a much more friendly divorce.0 -
I totally agree she most likely has someone else and the marriage is done.
From where you are you can hire a P.I. to gather info on her if there's anything to gather.
Concurrent with that, you need to see a lawyer to find out what your options are.
Forget cigarettes and drink. They're just escape devices to delay or prevent you from doing what you have to do. They're both also physically destructive.
When you visit her in May you will have both information and options.
I would probably show up without notice depending on what the lawyer and P.I. came up with.
They should prevent you from doing or saying the wrong things. You can act on them or forgive them but you will at least be well grounded on where you stand and not prejudice any subsequent legal action.
In your shoes, I would do this before seeing a marriage counselor.
Personally, from your statements I believe it's beyond that.
Marriage is tough on young marrieds and tougher on separated ones.
The most pathetic case I knew of was a GI overseas, unsucessfully trying to stop his allotment after his wife sold the house, his belongings and ran off with another man.0
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