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Let?s hear your funny phrases.

merlinn
O.K. Guys, one each per post! Short comparative phrases.
I get two because I started this topic!

?Slicker than snot on a doorknob ?

?Colder than a well-digger?s ass?
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Comments

121 comments

Date Votes
  • merlinn
    Busier than a one-armed paper hanger.
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  • Brookwood
    "How about some cheese to go with that whine!"
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  • Brookwood
    "Your mother wears army boots!" "Your sister sleeps in my bedroom"
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  • Brookwood
    "Gett'n old sure aint for sissy's!"
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  • merlinn
    Blind in one eye and can?t see out the other.
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  • babun
    I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
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  • remingtonoaks
    Even a blind man in a blizzard see that
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  • Brookwood
    "Well now! That's just a fine kettle of fish you got us into!"
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  • wiplash
    Life is tough, but it's tougher when you're stupid.
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  • Brookwood
    "She's running a bit off plumb"

    "He's a few cards shy of a full deck"
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  • 50-70RB
    Looks like a cross between a bicycle and a SOB....
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  • Alpine
    Department of Redundancy Department.

    If you ain't got pictures, I wasn't there.
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  • Old-Colts
    If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck; then it's a duck!
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  • merlinn
    If the queen had balls, she?d be the king.
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  • jwb267
    one guy to another
    he is so dumb I can tell him to go to hell and he would look forward to the trip
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  • jwb267
    second is first place looser. by Dale Earnhardt
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  • Brookwood
    "Just like trying to get blood out of a turnip"

    "It's colder than molasses in January"
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  • Brookwood
    "Here, hold my beer and watch this!"
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  • jwb267
    he is so dumb he couldn't pour pizz out of a boot with directions on the heel
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  • Brookwood
    At a very posh art festival, Guy holds up a blank white sheet of paper.

    This is my rendition of a polar bear eating marshmallows in a blizzard.
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  • mogley98
    Smells like a french whore house
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  • pulsarnc
    FIne as frog hair and not half as dusty
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  • Brookwood
    Hey bud, can you spare a dime for a fellow down on his luck?

    A dime fly's through the air in his direction.

    Hit the road, ya lousy bum!
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  • Brookwood
    "You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time!"
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  • swearengine
    Would not say poop if he had a mouthful.

    So tight you could not shove a flax seed up his ass with a sledgehammer.
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  • remingtonoaks
    As water tight as a duck's azz
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  • merlinn
    Tighter than a bull?s ass at fly time.
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  • bustedknee
    Hottern a burnin stump.
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  • bustedknee
    Ifn that woman wants to find me she's gonna have ta burn the woods and sift the ashes.
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  • bustedknee
    Boy, ya are driving me to drink...do ya think ya can come back agin tomorry?
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