Warning - really bad joke
Link to original page where I found it
A Fishy tale.
Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were swimming around in the sea - one called Justin and the other called Christian.
The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that patrolled the area. Finally one day Justin said to Christian, "I'm bored and frustrated at being a prawn; I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten..."
As Justin had his mind firmly on becoming a predator, a mysterious cod appears and says, "Your wish is granted", and lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.
Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate. Time went on (as it invariably does...) and Justin found himself becoming bored and lonely as a shark. All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.
While out swimming alone one day he sees the mysterious cod again and can't believe his luck.
Justin figured that the fish could change him back into a prawn. He begs the cod to change him back so, lo and behold; he is turned back into a prawn. With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes, Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail. (The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse).
Looking around the gathering at the reef, he searched for his old pal.
"Where's Christian?" he asked. "He's at home, distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy and became a shark", came the reply.
Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Christian's house. As he opened the coral gate the memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again.
"Christian replied "No way man, you'll eat me. You're a shark, the enemy and I'll not be tricked. "Justin cried back "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've
changed.".....................
.........."I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Christian"
A Fishy tale.
Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were swimming around in the sea - one called Justin and the other called Christian.
The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that patrolled the area. Finally one day Justin said to Christian, "I'm bored and frustrated at being a prawn; I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten..."
As Justin had his mind firmly on becoming a predator, a mysterious cod appears and says, "Your wish is granted", and lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.
Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate. Time went on (as it invariably does...) and Justin found himself becoming bored and lonely as a shark. All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.
While out swimming alone one day he sees the mysterious cod again and can't believe his luck.
Justin figured that the fish could change him back into a prawn. He begs the cod to change him back so, lo and behold; he is turned back into a prawn. With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes, Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail. (The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse).
Looking around the gathering at the reef, he searched for his old pal.
"Where's Christian?" he asked. "He's at home, distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy and became a shark", came the reply.
Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Christian's house. As he opened the coral gate the memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again.
"Christian replied "No way man, you'll eat me. You're a shark, the enemy and I'll not be tricked. "Justin cried back "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've
changed.".....................
.........."I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Christian"
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Another joke from the same site:
Memory Test
Three old men are at the doctor's office for a memory test.
The doctor says to the first old man, "What is three times three?"
"274," was his reply.
The doctor worriedly says to the second man, "It's your turn. What is three times three?"
"Tuesday" replies the second man.
The doctor sadly says to the third man, "Okay, your turn. What's three times three"?
"Nine" says the third man.
"That's great!" exclaims the doctor. "How did you get that"?
"Jeez, Doc, it's pretty simple," says the third man. "I just subtracted 274 from Tuesday."0 -
quote:Originally posted by Henry0Reilly
Another joke from the same site:
Memory Test
Three old men are at the doctor's office for a memory test.
The doctor says to the first old man, "What is three times three?"
"274," was his reply.
The doctor worriedly says to the second man, "It's your turn. What is three times three?"
"Tuesday" replies the second man.
The doctor sadly says to the third man, "Okay, your turn. What's three times three"?
"Nine" says the third man.
"That's great!" exclaims the doctor. "How did you get that"?
"Jeez, Doc, it's pretty simple," says the third man. "I just subtracted 274 from Tuesday."
Too Funny!!!0 -
And I come here of my own volition...
D.0 -
A scientist in Texas found a breed of porpoises that seemed to live forever. Wanting to study them he captured some which refused to eat anything he tried to feed them. He released them before they starved and continued to study them until he discovered that they only ate immature seagulls. Elated with this finding he again caught some of the mysterious mammals and found a place in Florida where he could purchase young seagulls to feed his subjects.
As he awaited his first shipment at the airport he was arrested by the FBI. Shocked and confused he asked why.
"You're in violation of the Mann Act."
"What?" Said the confused clinician.
"Interstate transport of young gulls for immortal porpoises."0 -
"My dear sir, the koala tea of Mersy is not strained." 0 -
Thanks; sent to all my Christian friends. 0 -
Alright, if that's how it's gonna be:
A man went back to his birthplace during Yuletide season. On Christmas morning, he went out to breakfast at a local diner. Looking at his menu, he decided to order the Eggs Benedict. When they arrived, he was surprised to see that they were served in a shiny platter resembling a hubcap. He asked his waiter: "What's with the fancy dish?" and the waiter replied:
"There's no plate like chrome for the hollendaise".0 -
. 0 -
Q: How does a home schooler change a light bulb?
A: First, mom checks three books on electricity out of the library, then the kids make models of light bulbs, read a biography of Thomas Edison and do a skit based on his life. Next, everyone studies the history of lighting methods, wrapping up with dipping their own candles. Next, everyone takes a trip to the store where they compare types of light bulbs as well as prices and figure out how much change they'll get if they buy two bulbs for $1.99 and pay with a five dollar bill. On the way home, a discussion develops over the history of money and also Abraham Lincoln, as his picture is on the five dollar bill. ! Finally, after building a homemade ladder out of branches dragged from the woods, the light bulb is installed. And there is light.0
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