What family member molested you?
Met a social worker last year. She said she would ask this question in a very dry matter-of-fact fashion and would usually get a response.
I think she said up around 75% of those in the foster care system were molested.
It's a scary statistic, but probably true.
I think she said up around 75% of those in the foster care system were molested.
It's a scary statistic, but probably true.
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Not surprising. Another statistic I saw stated that about 50% of the general population were molested as children. If that is true, then 75% of the foster care population wouldn't be out of line. Kids end up in foster care for a reason, usually because of some defect in the parents. (Dead, abusive, drug-addicted, in prison, etc.)
I have been married four times. Three of my four wives were victims of some sort of molestation as children or teens. One of the three ended up in foster care. All four were children of divorced parents.
Seems to fit the numbers given.0 -
Some researcher claimed 80% of all women had been raped at some point in their lives. I am very suspicious of these sorts of claims. I think people will respond to loaded, leading questions like "Who molested you?" with some sort of a response out of a desire to please the person asking. When psychologists question children about being molested 90% or so will say it happened. No it didn't, they think it happened because the researched suggested it did. 0 -
Sorry, I think this is a load of garbage. Were all of these people really molested or do they just "remember" it that way?
The POWER of suggestion is just that.0 -
I think a lot of "abuse" gets lumped together, whether sexual, emotional, or physical. I was never molested as a child, but I was abused a lot, usually by use of a leather belt or a sprout off the China berry tree. 0 -
I agree with Nunn.
I would say that if the statement by Saxon is correct (the 80% being raped at one point), I would imagine they embellished upon the word "rape" a little bit.
Rape, to me, is forcefully acting by means of threatening, or overpowering another to the point where they have no way out. Maybe they are classifing the times where men(boys) have talked their way into a girls pants when she doesn't want to have sex, but succumbs to the pressure.0 -
When I was a student at UW-Madison (late 80s to 1990), "rape" had plenty of definitions that seemed rather quirky. Call me silly, but to me, words mean things. To me, "rape" is forceably having sex with someone else against their will, or without their ability to offer consent. So, yes, that would include drugging someone, having sex with someone who is passed out, etc.
Too often, the definition included a woman who was drunk and agreed to have sex when she was drunk but was unhappy the next morning.
Sexual harassment is another one that gets me. The definition is so vague that simply admiring God's handiwork from afar can get you in serious trouble.0 -
Many years ago when I was fresh out of Grad School, I worked for a social service agency. One part of my job was working with sexually abused children.
After the LEO's finished interviewing the victim, I spent some time with them and their family. Follow up appointments or referrals to other programs were set up after that.
In those days, the research claimed approx. 1/2 of all female children were sexually abused and 1 in 4 males were sexually abused as children.
Based on my experience I think those numbers are still about right.
I have met some social workers/counselors out there that think almost everyone has been sexually abused. I think they are incorrect.0 -
I was beaten as a child, but only when me and my older sister did something terribly wrong. We had a number of wooden spoons broken across our butts. If the infraction was bad enough, punishment waited until dad got home, and then we got the belt. I'm a better person for it all. 0 -
Yes, the definition of "abuse" has changed dramatically in modern times.
Now a "spanking", is considered physical abuse.
Not speaking in a calm, even tone,........much less yelling, is considered emotional abuse.
Hogwash![}:)]0 -
quote:Originally posted by Marc1301
Yes, the definition of "abuse" has changed dramatically in modern times.
Now a "spanking", is considered physical abuse.
Not speaking in a calm, even tone,........much less yelling, is considered emotional abuse.
Hogwash![}:)]
Now now Marc, you better go in Time Out!0 -
quote:Originally posted by spanielsells
Too often, the definition included a woman who was drunk and agreed to have sex when she was drunk but was unhappy the next morning.
This was on Inside Edition last night. A woman got drunk at a bar, woke up with someone she did not know and cried rape. He claims otherwise. The judge has ruled that the words victim, attacker and rape are not allowed to be used in the trial.0 -
I was never molested, but some of the butt whippings my mother gave me could have gotten her tossed in jail these days. I look back and almost to a T, every whipping my Dad gave me I deserved, however when it came to my mother most of the abuse I got from her was her just losing control and lashing out at something. I left this environment at 14, and went to live with my Dad's mother. Still to this day I do not have a relationship wth my mother, and she has never even met two of my four daughter's. My grandmother became more of a mother to me than my real mother ever was, and if I am anything today it is because of my Grandmother. May she rest in peace.
Trinity +++0 -
I must admit that I have great difficulty wrapping my head around the numbers that are quoted. I do not substantually doubt them, I simply have trouble believing so many of my fellow men are those kinds of molesters.
If the numbers are correct (and given that each abuser/molestor) has multiple victims, [2?, 4?] it would indicate that at least 1 in 4 males abuses or molests women, in most cases juvenile or adolescent FAMILY MEMBERS. That would be 1 in 4 posters here on the board.
And mom and dad said there are no monsters.0 -
The numbers I quoted were for Sexual abuse of children as a whole, not just within the family.
I have read many studies about sexual preditors of children. These studies indicate the average pedophile has in excess of 200 victims.
I have interviewed or read the interviews of several pedophiles over the years and that numbers actually holds up.0 -
nothing happened to me or my sis. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to live with that kind of stigma. it would have to suck. 0 -
There is a wide range of activities included in the term sexual molestation. I'd like to see a statistical breakdown of these activities and their percentages. 0 -
Dad has given me my fair share of spankings. But i deserved them all. [:D][:D] 0 -
quote:Originally posted by v35
There is a wide range of activities included in the term sexual molestation. I'd like to see a statistical breakdown of these activities and their percentages.
There is also a thing called "false memory". Remember the McMartin debacle? Psychoanalytic journals are fraught with cases of therapists found in the course of their practice to either have suggested incidents of molestation that never occurred, or elevated by suggestion an incident that did occur from something innocent and unintentional to something malicious and deliberate. Not saying child molestation doesn't happen; only that so does this.0 -
I have never been molested and have never molested anyone.
I also lived for extended periods of time with 6 different families while growing up.
Either I was extreamely lucky or those statistics are way off.0 -
i got more than my share of abused beating, and the scars to prove it, but was never touched sexually, i have know several people that was while growing up, and i have yet to see one of them be normal as an adult, it is sad that it sorta turns on a switch in some people, and just screws up their minds, it may not hold true in every case, it is a damn shame that someone can do that sort of damage to a child for a moment of sexual satisfaction 0 -
Yes, I had a neighbor with a creepy son several years older than me, who would, if he walked past the house and found, me, one of my female friends, or my sister, alone playing in the yard, would grab us, drag us behind the garage or shed, push us to the ground, get on top of us so that we couldn't get away, and then "do things" to us. He only did this to me once, and to my knowlege, the same to my friends and sister before we devised a plan to never play alone outdoors, and if we saw him leaving his house, to warn each other and stay indoors.
Ends up, the kid was mentally retarded, and had some rather serious mental health issues, schizophrenia, I think. This was the mid 70's, and people didn't talk about such things, mental illness, molestation, etc. Also, he was raised in a home where the mother died when he and his siblings were very young, so there was a great deal of general sympathy in the neighborhood for the family. No charges were ever filed, none of us ever spoke to anyone about it, except each other.
Creepy thing is, when I was in college, I came home one weekend, and was attending Saturday evening mass, when my preteen neighbor and a friend sidled up to me in my pew and asked me if I could walk them home after mass. I asked why, as we only lived a block from the church, and they pointed out the same perp in a pew several rows behind us, and revealed that he had "done things" to a friend of theirs, and they were afaid of him. Apparently, the father of this girl beat the snot out of him after the incident.
Later, in my adulthood, when speaking with my women friends, almost universally, we all had a creepy neighbor, or creepy uncle, or brother of a friend who molested them in some way, or raped them, and so I believe the 80% stat, as well as the 200 or more victims. If you check the Internet on any of the State run Megan's Law sites, you will note that those shown are only 3rd degree offenders, and so excludes 1st and 2nd degree offenders, and those who have not been caught yet. I suspect a perp, like a drunk driver, has done the deed several times before the law actually catches up with them.0 -
quote:Originally posted by SaxonPig
Some researcher claimed 80% of all women had been raped at some point in their lives. I am very suspicious of these sorts of claims. I think people will respond to loaded, leading questions like "Who molested you?" with some sort of a response out of a desire to please the person asking. When psychologists question children about being molested 90% or so will say it happened. No it didn't, they think it happened because the researched suggested it did.
Latest survey i have seen show 1 in 5 women have been molested or raped. Personally i have little tolerance for this behavior. I work in the medical field and see all kinds of garbage and other by products from such abuse. I think if society played a harsher roll in the punishment relm, many of those commiting these crimes would stop, or wish they had.0 -
Weren't these numbers sort of being promoted by a banned ex-member ??
Doug0 -
quote:Originally posted by Captplaid
I think she said up around 75% of those in the foster care system were molested.
From our foster care experience, I would say it is accurate.0 -
quote:Originally posted by DancesWithSheep
quote:Originally posted by v35
There is a wide range of activities included in the term sexual molestation. I'd like to see a statistical breakdown of these activities and their percentages.
There is also a thing called "false memory". Remember the McMartin debacle? Psychoanalytic journals are fraught with cases of therapists found in the course of their practice to either have suggested incidents of molestation that never occurred, or elevated by suggestion an incident that did occur from something innocent and unintentional to something malicious and deliberate. Not saying child molestation doesn't happen; only that so does this.
+1 from my experience in criminal defense.0 -
My wife molests me, but I have to beg her to do it now-a-days. I've lost my youthful sex appeal I guess.[:D] 0 -
What's black and blue and doesn't like sex?
The little kid in the trunk of my car![:D][:D][:D][:D]
Cmon people! lighten up! It's just a joke!0 -
My wife----over and over 0
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