Two old guys

oldnbald

October 25, 2007 19:19

Two old guys are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide. The first old guy says to the second guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."

The second old guy says, "That's OK, what a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate."

The first old guy says, "Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like?"
The second old guy says: "Well, she is 27 yrs old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs, big bust, and is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like?"

To which the first old guy says, "Doesn't matter,
--- let's look for yours." [:D] [:D] [:D]

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  oldnbald

  October 25, 2007 19:19

  Two old men decided that since they were so old and probably didn't have much time left on this earth, they would like to have a good time.
  
  After a few drinks they end up at the local brothel. The madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, "go up to the first two rooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk, I am not wasting two of my girls on them. They won't know the difference."
  
  Her manager does as she is told and the two old men go up the stairs and take care of their business.
  As they are walking home, the first one says, "you know, I think my girl was dead!"
  
  "Dead", says his friend, "why would you think that?"
  
  Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her."
  
  His friends says, "I think mine was a witch."
  
  "A WITCH!! What makes you say that?"
  
  "Well, I was making love to her, kissing on her neck and I gave her a little bite and then she farted and flew out the window!"

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  oldnbald

  October 25, 2007 19:19

  Two old guys, one 80 and one 87, were sitting on a park bench one morning.The 87-year-old had just finished his morning jog and wasn't even short of breath. The 80-year-old was amazed at the guy's stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy. The 87-year-old said, "Well, I eat rye bread every day. It keeps your energy level high and you'll have great stamina with the ladies. You'll feel like 40 again!"So, on the way home the 80-year-old stopped at the bakery. As he was looking around, the saleslady asked if he needed any help. He said, "Do you have any rye bread?"She said, "Yes, there's a whole shelf of it. Would you like some?"He said, "I want five loaves." She said, "My goodness, five loaves! By the time you get to the 3rd loaf, it'll be hard."He replied, "I can't believe everybody knows about this but me."
  
  
  
  
  A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

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  oldnbald

  October 25, 2007 19:19

  Two old guys, one 80 and one 87, were sitting on their usual park bench one morning. The 87 year old had just finished his morning jog and wasn't even short of breath. The 80 year old was amazed at his friend's stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy. The 87 year old said "Well, I eat rye bread every day It keeps your energy level high and you'll have great stamina with the ladies.
  
  So, on the way home, the 80 year old stops at the bakery. As he was looking around, the lady asked if he needed any help. He said, "Do you have any rye bread?" She said, "Yes, there's a whole shelf of it. Would you like some?" He said, "I want 5 loaves. She said, "My goodness, 5 loaves... by the time you get to the 5th loaf, it'll be hard" He replied, "I can't believe it, everybody in the world knows about this but me."

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