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3 comments

  • slipgate
    If you own either a dog or cat... or if you're thinking about getting one or both... this is for you. Enjoy. --Joe
    As seen in a dog's diary:

    7am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
    8am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
    9am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
    Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
    2pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
    3pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
    4pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
    6pm - Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!
    7pm - Oh boy! Dad! My favorite!
    8pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
    11pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in a people bed! My favorite!


    As seen in a cat's diary:

    Day 183 of my captivity...
    My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
    They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
    The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture.
    Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.
    Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs.
    In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair - must try this on their bed.
    Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.

    There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

    I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.

    But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...



    Larry
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  • He Dog
    The ancient Egyptians worshipped cats. Cats have never forgotten.
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  • Kodiakk
    Cats take more skill to hit when they are running.
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