Almost a Miracle
Hope y'all take this one in stride and in good humor. It's an oldie but still a good one.
It was a Sunday morning and services had just begun in the big white tent pitched out in the field. The preacher was strutting back and forth across the makeshift stage, extorting the faithful to a higher and more profound worship, etc.
At one point, he stopped and exclaimed that they would soon see the power of faith right before their very eyes. He asked if there was anyone in the audience who had an affliction.
One hand went up. The preacher entreatied the man to rise and come forward to the front of the tent. Very slowly a man stood up and leaning heavily upon his crutches, managed to drag himself out of the aisle he was sitting in and up to the front.
The preacher asked the man his name. "Frank." replied the man. The reverend commented that he could see where the devil had tied his legs but that his faith would untie them shortly and make him well again. He instructed Frank to move off to the side and stand behind the large screen that had been set up.
Looking out into the anxious throng the preacher asked if anyone else had an affliction. Another hand went up, very meekly. A twerpy little man got up, walked to the front and stood next to the reverend. The reverend asked him his name.
"Errrr....errrr....errrrr.....errrr....Ralp! Errrrr...Ralph! Errr...Ralph!" stammered the man.
The preacher quickly added "Say no more Ralph for it is clear that the devil has tied thy tongue. Stand with Frank behind the sceen and wait for the power of faith to rid you of your affliction."
And so, off went Ralph to stand with Frank behind the screen.
Well, a few prayers, some readings, a collection and two songs later, the big moment came.
The preacher dropped to his knees in front of the near-frenzied throng and screamed out "Frank! Frank! Throw thy crutches away for you are cured!!!"
Suddenly, two crutches sailed over the screen and onto the floor in front of the faithful.
The preacher then shouted "Ralph! Ralph! Speak to me! Speak to me, Ralph".
There was an uneasy silence. Again the preacher shouted "Speak to me Ralph!!! Speak to me!!!"
From behind the screen came "Fer....Fer...Fer....Fer....Fer...Frank fell down!"
It was a Sunday morning and services had just begun in the big white tent pitched out in the field. The preacher was strutting back and forth across the makeshift stage, extorting the faithful to a higher and more profound worship, etc.
At one point, he stopped and exclaimed that they would soon see the power of faith right before their very eyes. He asked if there was anyone in the audience who had an affliction.
One hand went up. The preacher entreatied the man to rise and come forward to the front of the tent. Very slowly a man stood up and leaning heavily upon his crutches, managed to drag himself out of the aisle he was sitting in and up to the front.
The preacher asked the man his name. "Frank." replied the man. The reverend commented that he could see where the devil had tied his legs but that his faith would untie them shortly and make him well again. He instructed Frank to move off to the side and stand behind the large screen that had been set up.
Looking out into the anxious throng the preacher asked if anyone else had an affliction. Another hand went up, very meekly. A twerpy little man got up, walked to the front and stood next to the reverend. The reverend asked him his name.
"Errrr....errrr....errrrr.....errrr....Ralp! Errrrr...Ralph! Errr...Ralph!" stammered the man.
The preacher quickly added "Say no more Ralph for it is clear that the devil has tied thy tongue. Stand with Frank behind the sceen and wait for the power of faith to rid you of your affliction."
And so, off went Ralph to stand with Frank behind the screen.
Well, a few prayers, some readings, a collection and two songs later, the big moment came.
The preacher dropped to his knees in front of the near-frenzied throng and screamed out "Frank! Frank! Throw thy crutches away for you are cured!!!"
Suddenly, two crutches sailed over the screen and onto the floor in front of the faithful.
The preacher then shouted "Ralph! Ralph! Speak to me! Speak to me, Ralph".
There was an uneasy silence. Again the preacher shouted "Speak to me Ralph!!! Speak to me!!!"
From behind the screen came "Fer....Fer...Fer....Fer....Fer...Frank fell down!"
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[:D][:D][:D] 0 -
LOL! 0 -
heeheeeheeee[:D][:D] 0 -
LROL! 0 -
[B)][}:)] 0 -
[:D][:D] 0 -
I really wasn't expecting that.
Shoulda seen it coming...
Thanks for the laugh.0 -
Hopefully that would be exhorting (to incite) the faithful and not extorting (to obtain by force) the faithful, though I must admit extorting would be for accurate for a televangelist! 0 -
I cant stop laughing[:D] 0
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