Last Day
It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.
When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift certificate envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine imported cigars.
The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.
At each of the houses along his route, he was met with congratulations, farewells, cards, and gifts of all types and values.
At the final house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful young blonde in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door (which she closed behind him), and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where they had a most passionate liaison.
Afterwards, they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice.
When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.
"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, ".....but what's the dollar for?"
"Well," she said, "Last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you?"
He said, "...Scr*w him .........give him a dollar."
The blonde then blushed and said, "....But the breakfast was my idea."
When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift certificate envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine imported cigars.
The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.
At each of the houses along his route, he was met with congratulations, farewells, cards, and gifts of all types and values.
At the final house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful young blonde in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door (which she closed behind him), and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where they had a most passionate liaison.
Afterwards, they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice.
When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.
"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, ".....but what's the dollar for?"
"Well," she said, "Last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you?"
He said, "...Scr*w him .........give him a dollar."
The blonde then blushed and said, "....But the breakfast was my idea."
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Last day of school is tomorrow, go back January 4th 2008...
[:D]0 -
Enjoy your time off Jacob and stay out of trouble [:D] 0 -
no more school til january! 0 -
PARTY TIME!!! IN THE OZARKS.. 
..Loko [:D]0 -
No school till next year? How many of you want to bet that his post count will double in the next two weeks? 0 -
quote:Originally posted by Mk 19
No school till next year? How many of you want to bet that his post count will double in the next two weeks?
i guarntee it will, thats one goal. another is study, another is work, andother is run around with friends.0 -
quote:Originally posted by Jacob2008
quote:Originally posted by Mk 19
No school till next year? How many of you want to bet that his post count will double in the next two weeks?
i guarntee it will, thats one goal. another is study, another is work, andother is run around with friends.
[:D][:D][:D]0 -
HEY LITTLE BUDDY COME SHOVEL MY DRIVEWAY [:D][:D][:D][:D][:D] 0 -
quote:i guarntee it will, thats one goal
You know you live a sad, sad life when one of your goals is to double your post count here. Get out and do something productive! Volunteer at a homeless shelter or soup kitchen. Cut or stack wood or shovel a side walk for an elderly neighbor. Lots of worthwhile things to do.0 -
Enjoy your break![8D] 0 -
quote:Originally posted by iluvguns
quote:i guarntee it will, thats one goal
You know you live a sad, sad life when one of your goals is to double your post count here. Get out and do something productive! Volunteer at a homeless shelter or soup kitchen. Cut or stack wood or shovel a side walk for an elderly neighbor. Lots of worthwhile things to do.
No more snow, No homeless shelters or kitchens around here, no more wood to cut, and dad wont let me go out again tonight, so im going to work on my post count
youll notice im only on here right after school and once i get home, because i have nothing else to do.0 -
Now go and drink a lot of beer. 0 -
When I was your age I`d grab my shotgun after school and go bunny hunting. 0 -
i have to go back january 2 my 40 th birthday. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by soopershot
When I was your age I`d grab my shotgun after school and go bunny hunting.
[:D][:D] I used to also with my .22, but now there is a few houses where I am at, and where I usually hunted, not to mention its "City Limits" or whatever the heck.0
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