HER, AGAIN
Subject: HER, AGAIN
Hillary Clinton said that her childhood dream was to be an
Olympic athlete. But she was not athletic enough. She said she
wanted to be an astronaut, but at the time they didn't take women. She said
she wanted to go into medicine, but hospitals made her woozy. Should
she be telling people this story? I mean she's basically saying she
wants to be president because she can't do anything else."
--Jay Leno
"Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for
president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she
finally wants to see what it's like to sleep in the president's bed."
--Jay Leno
"Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Sen. Hillary
Clinton running for president. Apparently, some Democrats don't like
the idea, while others hate it."
--Conan O'Brien
"In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton wondered
why President Bush can't find the tallest man in Afghanistan.
Probably for the same reason she couldn't find the fattest intern
under the desk."
--Jay Leno
"Former Prsien Bill Clinton said that if his wife,
Hillary, is elected president, he will do whatever she wants. You know
Bill Clinton -- when he makes a vow to Hillary, you can take that to the
bank."
-Jay Leno
"Did you know Bill and Hillary Clinton were born under the
same sign? Know what sign? 'For Sale.'"
-Jay Leno
"A student from the University of Washington has sold his
soul on eBay for $400. He's a law student, so he probably doesn't need
it, but still, that's not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said,
'Hey, at least I got some furniture and a Senate seat for mine."
--Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton said today that she wants legislation to
allow all ex-felons to vote. See, this way all the
Clinton's former business partners can vote for her in 2008."
--Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out. So much
of her personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will
want to sleep with an intern."
- Craig Kilborn
In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,'
Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love
with him, getting married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as
husband and wife. Then on page two, the trouble starts."
- Jay Leno
"In the book, she says when Bill told her he was having an
affair, she said 'I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for
air.'
No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said."
- David Letterman
"Hillary Cli nton, our junior senator from New York,
announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office
of the President of the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly
disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a
two-impeachment family."
- David Letterman
"Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her first party
in her new home in Washington. People said it was a lot like the
parties she used to host at the White House. In fact, even the
furniture was the same."
- Jay Leno
"Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for
breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying
a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded
that Bush spend the night on the couch."
- Craig Kilborn
"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman
in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful.
Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with
it."
- Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state
of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family
Bible. . . the one with only seven commandments."
-David Letterman
Hillary Clinton said that her childhood dream was to be an
Olympic athlete. But she was not athletic enough. She said she
wanted to be an astronaut, but at the time they didn't take women. She said
she wanted to go into medicine, but hospitals made her woozy. Should
she be telling people this story? I mean she's basically saying she
wants to be president because she can't do anything else."
--Jay Leno
"Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for
president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she
finally wants to see what it's like to sleep in the president's bed."
--Jay Leno
"Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Sen. Hillary
Clinton running for president. Apparently, some Democrats don't like
the idea, while others hate it."
--Conan O'Brien
"In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton wondered
why President Bush can't find the tallest man in Afghanistan.
Probably for the same reason she couldn't find the fattest intern
under the desk."
--Jay Leno
"Former Prsien Bill Clinton said that if his wife,
Hillary, is elected president, he will do whatever she wants. You know
Bill Clinton -- when he makes a vow to Hillary, you can take that to the
bank."
-Jay Leno
"Did you know Bill and Hillary Clinton were born under the
same sign? Know what sign? 'For Sale.'"
-Jay Leno
"A student from the University of Washington has sold his
soul on eBay for $400. He's a law student, so he probably doesn't need
it, but still, that's not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said,
'Hey, at least I got some furniture and a Senate seat for mine."
--Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton said today that she wants legislation to
allow all ex-felons to vote. See, this way all the
Clinton's former business partners can vote for her in 2008."
--Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out. So much
of her personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will
want to sleep with an intern."
- Craig Kilborn
In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,'
Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love
with him, getting married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as
husband and wife. Then on page two, the trouble starts."
- Jay Leno
"In the book, she says when Bill told her he was having an
affair, she said 'I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for
air.'
No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said."
- David Letterman
"Hillary Cli nton, our junior senator from New York,
announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office
of the President of the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly
disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a
two-impeachment family."
- David Letterman
"Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her first party
in her new home in Washington. People said it was a lot like the
parties she used to host at the White House. In fact, even the
furniture was the same."
- Jay Leno
"Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for
breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying
a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded
that Bush spend the night on the couch."
- Craig Kilborn
"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman
in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful.
Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with
it."
- Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state
of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family
Bible. . . the one with only seven commandments."
-David Letterman
0
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All good but this is the best
In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton wondered
why President Bush can't find the tallest man in Afghanistan.
Probably for the same reason she couldn't find the fattest intern
under the desk0 -
Very good! 0 -
[:D][8D][:)]...Cut and pasted that one to some Democrap friends... 0 -
Leno is pretty funny. 0
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