Another blonde joke
A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?"
"Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track."
"What sort of question?"
"Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?'
"The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."[:o)]
"It is fortunate for governments that the people do not think. ADOLPH HITLER"
"Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track."
"What sort of question?"
"Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?'
"The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."[:o)]
"It is fortunate for governments that the people do not think. ADOLPH HITLER"
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A teenage blonde who wanted to earn some extra money decided to hire herself out as a handyman and went looking for some work.
She went to the first house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs."Well, you can paint my porch," he said. "how much do you charge?"
"How about $50?"
The man agreed and told her the paint was in the garage.
A short time later the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?"
"Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats." Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."[:0]0 -
So this blonde is sitting at home in despair. She has thousands in credit card bills and no money. As she sits there close to tears there is a knock at the door. The gentleman explains that he is a handy man trying to earn some extra money and wonders if she has any odd jobs for him to do. She says she doesn't and he leaves. This gives her an idea though. She could do the same thing! So she sets out going door to door asking people if they have any odd jobs for her. Everyone declines. She's now in more despair then ever. Finally she stops at a very large house and the guy that answers says that his wife wanted him to paint the porch but if she'll do it he would pay her $500. The blonde is estatic and says she can do the job. He tells her the paint, brushes, rollers and drop cloths are in the garage. She tells him she'll start right away. The guy is happy and sits down and turns on the game. About an hour later she comes to the window and tells him she's all done. He looks at his watch and says "really"? She says "yup, all done with two coats". He looks at his watch again and says "two coats"? She says "that's right and by the way it's not a Porche, it's a Ferrarri". [;)] 0 -
Another Blonde joke
A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" had reached the final
plateau. If she answered the next question correctly, she would win
$1,000,000. If she answered incorrectly, she would pocket only the $32,000
milestone money.
And as she suspected it would be, the million-dollar question was no
pushover.
It was, "Which of the following species of birds does not build its own
nest, but instead lays its eggs in the nests of other birds?
Is it:
A) the condor;
the buzzard;
C) the cuckoo; or
D) the vulture?"
The woman was on the spot. She did not know the answer. And she was doubly
on the spot because she had used up her 50/50 Lifeline and her Audience
Poll Lifeline. All that remained was her Phone-a-Friend Lifeline, and the
woman had hoped against hope that she would not have to use it, mainly
because the only friend that she knew would be home happened to be a
blonde. But the contestant had no alternative. She called her friend and
gave her
the question and the four choices.
The blonde responded unhesitatingly: "That's easy.
The answer is C: The cuckoo."
The contestant had to make a decision and make it fast. She considered
employing a reverse strategy and giving any answer except the one that her
friend had given her. And considering that her friend was a blonde, that
would seem to be the logical thing to do. On the other hand, the blonde
had responded with such confidence, such certitude, that the contestant
could
not help but be persuaded.
"I need an answer," said the host. Crossing her fingers, the contestant
said, "C: The cuckoo." "Is that your final answer?" asked the host.
"Yes, that is my final answer." replied the contestant.
Moments later the host said, "That answer is.......... absolutely correct.
ou are now a millionaire!"
Three days later, the contestant hosted a party for her family and
friends-- including the blonde who had helped her win the million dollars.
"Jenny, I just do not know how to thank you," said the contestant.
"Because of your knowing the answer to that final question, I am now a
millionaire.
And do you want to know something? It was the assuredness with which you
answered the question that convinced me to go with your choice. By the
way, how did you happen to know the right answer?"
"Oh, come on," said the blonde. "Everybody knows that cuckoos don't build
nests. They live in clocks." [:D] [:D]0 -
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it," she replied "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her date asked,"What do you mean?"
"Well, I saw them flip a coin and one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback! HELLO...it's only 25 cents!" [:D] [:D] [:D][:D] [:D] [:D] [:D] [:D] [:D]
When a worm wants to relax,does he go fishing?
ATF,Eagle Guns0 -
lmao....sounds about right, average bimbo..[:D] 0 -
A blond is driving down a country road and sees another blond sitting in a row boat in the middle of a field rowing away and going nowhere.
She pulls over, gets out of her car, and yells to the other blond,
"It's girls like you that give us blonds a bad name, and if I could swim I'd come out there and slap you one".0 -
funny, sent that on to a few of my Blonde friends and a couple of non-blondes that think they are blondes.[:0] 0
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