Zip Joke
My wife's been accusing me. of late, of getting a swelled head and becoming
obnoxious. ... can you imagine that?[:0][:D]
Anyway, here's an e-mail she mailed me today. I think she's changed a few of
the names (I don't really know Tom Cruise yet) but I kinda get the drift.
***
Zip, a GB member, was bragging to his boss one day. "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name Someone, Anyone and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "Okay, Zip, how about Tom Cruise"?
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends and I can prove it."
So, Zip and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Zip ! Great to see You! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Zip's boss is still sceptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Zip that he thinks Zip's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else," Zip says.
"President Bush," his Boss quickly retorts.
Yep", Zip says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington."
So, off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Zip on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Zip, what a surprise. I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Zip, who again implores him to name anyone else.
The new Pope," his boss replies.
"Sure!" says Zip. "I've known the Pope a long time."
So, off they fly to Rome.
Zip and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Zip says, this will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."
He disappears into the crowd headed toward St. Peter's.
Sure enough, half an hour later, Zip emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But by the time Zip returns, he finds that his Boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss' side, Zip asks him, "What happened"?
His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and The Pope came out on the balcony and the Japanese tourist next to me asked, "Who's that on the balcony with Zip"?
[:D]
obnoxious. ... can you imagine that?[:0][:D]
Anyway, here's an e-mail she mailed me today. I think she's changed a few of
the names (I don't really know Tom Cruise yet) but I kinda get the drift.
***
Zip, a GB member, was bragging to his boss one day. "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name Someone, Anyone and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "Okay, Zip, how about Tom Cruise"?
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends and I can prove it."
So, Zip and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Zip ! Great to see You! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Zip's boss is still sceptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Zip that he thinks Zip's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else," Zip says.
"President Bush," his Boss quickly retorts.
Yep", Zip says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington."
So, off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Zip on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Zip, what a surprise. I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Zip, who again implores him to name anyone else.
The new Pope," his boss replies.
"Sure!" says Zip. "I've known the Pope a long time."
So, off they fly to Rome.
Zip and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Zip says, this will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."
He disappears into the crowd headed toward St. Peter's.
Sure enough, half an hour later, Zip emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But by the time Zip returns, he finds that his Boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss' side, Zip asks him, "What happened"?
His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and The Pope came out on the balcony and the Japanese tourist next to me asked, "Who's that on the balcony with Zip"?
[:D]
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[:D][:D][:D]
Do you know me[?]0 -
You don't know me. I'm a phantom. A figment of my own, vast imagination. I don't truly exist...or do I[?][?][?][?][?] 0
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