Wanna talk about a shocker!!!!!!!!!
I just had a phone call that totally blew my mind!
It was from my oldest stepson (yes from the same ex that I have been haveing problems with but he no longer lives with her either) who I have not talked with in almost 4 years.
He really did not like me as a stepfather because he though I was too strict and such.
Well we actually had a great conversation and he is really looking like he is going to turn out to be a fine man.
He is now 17 and he will be leaving for basic training in the Marines as soon as he finishes High School in the spring. He says that all those hard feelings about me are now in the past and that he understands why I was the way I was.
He has no contact with his mom (or has not in awhile) and aslo feels that I am better off without her and her problems.
It is funny how contact was originally made! My daughter happened to find him om MySpace about a week ago and emailed him with the phone number. He had not seen it untill today and he desided to call.
Life can be a trip at times![;)][:D]
It was from my oldest stepson (yes from the same ex that I have been haveing problems with but he no longer lives with her either) who I have not talked with in almost 4 years.
He really did not like me as a stepfather because he though I was too strict and such.
Well we actually had a great conversation and he is really looking like he is going to turn out to be a fine man.
He is now 17 and he will be leaving for basic training in the Marines as soon as he finishes High School in the spring. He says that all those hard feelings about me are now in the past and that he understands why I was the way I was.
He has no contact with his mom (or has not in awhile) and aslo feels that I am better off without her and her problems.
It is funny how contact was originally made! My daughter happened to find him om MySpace about a week ago and emailed him with the phone number. He had not seen it untill today and he desided to call.
Life can be a trip at times![;)][:D]
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Looks like the boy you knew grew up to be a fine young man. 0 -
Kevin that has got to make you feel good. Stepchildren usually have no bond to step parents and its rare that you hear from them much after they leave home.
But they usually will realize as they grow up who was looking out for their best interest.0 -
If he thinks you were hard on him, he's got a big surprize out of his DI.[;)] 0 -
quote:Originally posted by sig232
Kevin that has got to make you feel good. Stepchildren usually have no bond to step parents and its rare that you hear from them much after they leave home.
But they usually will realize as they grow up who was looking out for their best interest.
I admit that I was a bit strict with him. But we also lived in California in a town were they have major gang problems and such and I was looking out for him to not get involved in that type of stuff as he was just entering his teens and at the age were kids are more prone to getting into it.
Out here where we live now I am not quite as strict as I was because there is no where near the problem with that type of stuff. Not to say I do not keep some tight reins on my kids now because I do.
I just happen to know how easy it is for a kid to fall into the wrong crowd and get into trouble because I had my share if it as I was growing up!0 -
"Strict, is right". We all use the word "FUNNY" when we cannot find a word to describe,"WONDERFUL".
The boy/young man, has come to a cross-road in his life.
I believe he wants you to be a part of it... U did something right Kevin, that man is thanking you for it now. Be proud....0 -
Life is indeed short, my friend. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by git_r_done
I just had a phone call that totally blew my mind!
It was from my oldest stepson (yes from the same ex that I have been haveing problems with but he no longer lives with her either) who I have not talked with in almost 4 years.
He really did not like me as a stepfather because he though I was too strict and such.
Well we actually had a great conversation and he is really looking like he is going to turn out to be a fine man.
He is now 17 and he will be leaving for basic training in the Marines as soon as he finishes High School in the spring. He says that all those hard feelings about me are now in the past and that he understands why I was the way I was.
He has no contact with his mom (or has not in awhile) and aslo feels that I am better off without her and her problems.
It is funny how contact was originally made! My daughter happened to find him om MySpace about a week ago and emailed him with the phone number. He had not seen it untill today and he desided to call.
Life can be a trip at times![;)][:D]
You could have at least steered him in the right direction...turned him into a real man...a United States Army Soldier!...well I guess next best will do...[8D]0 -
quote:Originally posted by Polite Psycho
Life is indeed short, my friend.
...all too short for some Doc...0 -
quote: I just had a phone call that totally blew my mind!
It was from my oldest stepson (yes from the same ex that I have been haveing problems with but he no longer lives with her either) who I have not talked with in almost 4 years.
He really did not like me as a stepfather because he though I was too strict and such.
Well we actually had a great conversation and he is really looking like he is going to turn out to be a fine man.
He is now 17 and he will be leaving for basic training in the Marines as soon as he finishes High School in the spring. He says that all those hard feelings about me are now in the past and that he understands why I was the way I was.
He has no contact with his mom (or has not in awhile) and aslo feels that I am better off without her and her problems.
It is funny how contact was originally made! My daughter happened to find him om MySpace about a week ago and emailed him with the phone number. He had not seen it untill today and he desided to call.
Life can be a trip at times!
That was pretty kool to read Kevin. Glad to hear that you two are back in touch with each other.
Jon0 -
Kevin...thank you. 0 -
Sounds like your daughter has a bond to her step brother to look him up and contact him. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by ECC
quote:Originally posted by git_r_done
I just had a phone call that totally blew my mind!
It was from my oldest stepson (yes from the same ex that I have been haveing problems with but he no longer lives with her either) who I have not talked with in almost 4 years.
He really did not like me as a stepfather because he though I was too strict and such.
Well we actually had a great conversation and he is really looking like he is going to turn out to be a fine man.
He is now 17 and he will be leaving for basic training in the Marines as soon as he finishes High School in the spring. He says that all those hard feelings about me are now in the past and that he understands why I was the way I was.
He has no contact with his mom (or has not in awhile) and aslo feels that I am better off without her and her problems.
It is funny how contact was originally made! My daughter happened to find him om MySpace about a week ago and emailed him with the phone number. He had not seen it untill today and he desided to call.
Life can be a trip at times![;)][:D]
You could have at least steered him in the right direction...turned him into a real man...a United States Army Soldier!...well I guess next best will do...[8D]
He actually said that Army was going to be his first choice due to his exposure from me. But he had a couple friends he was enlisting with and they talked him into the Marines.
I am just glad to hear that he has made the choice of going into the service!
He has been put through hell with the same problems with his mom as me and the kids have. Because of this he was on track to be a little hellion for a while.
He can use the military to really get his life back in order!
You see he is currently living in forster care. When me and the kid's mother split up he went to live with his grandparents (because at that time he didn't care for me at all). He got a bit out of control while living there and they just could not deal with it and had him placed in foster care.
I think this too was a bit of an eye opener for him as he really has not had much contact with any family in over a year.
I assured him that he was allways welcome here anytime!
He said he will make plans for a visit on his first 10 day leave upon completeing basic.
My daughter is very excited as well! She has a good memory of him and has allways asked about him when talking to her grandparents. My youngest son was young enuff that he does not really have much of a memory of him even though he knows he has a older brother.0 -
quote:Originally posted by Captplaid
Sounds like your daughter has a bond to her step brother to look him up and contact him.
She does have alot of memories of him as she was old enuff to remember him well.
My son was just a little too young to have much of a memory about him.0 -
That's great! Who knows, we may cross paths somewhere... 0 -
Sounds like good news, the Marines will be lucky to get him. 0 -
Good to hear of your success.
quote:Originally posted by git_r_done
quote:Originally posted by sig232
Kevin that has got to make you feel good. Stepchildren usually have no bond to step parents and its rare that you hear from them much after they leave home.
But they usually will realize as they grow up who was looking out for their best interest.
I admit that I was a bit strict with him. But we also lived in California in a town were they have major gang problems and such and I was looking out for him to not get involved in that type of stuff as he was just entering his teens and at the age were kids are more prone to getting into it.
Out here where we live now I am not quite as strict as I was because there is no where near the problem with that type of stuff. Not to say I do not keep some tight reins on my kids now because I do.
I just happen to know how easy it is for a kid to fall into the wrong crowd and get into trouble because I had my share if it as I was growing up!0 -
G-R-D.
He is now 17 and he will be leaving for basic training in the Marines as soon as he finishes High School in the spring. He says that all those hard feelings about me are now in the past and that he understands why I was the way I was.
What goes around comes around.
Job well done.
Be proud!0 -
Sometimes you win some, sometimes you lose, but its the trying, and sticking to your guns even when it hurts you more than him.But when it pays off as it has for you, nothing could be any better.
Life has its rites of passage and its people like you that keep the drill going in the right direction. Thanks S B0 -
good deal kevin, i hope i am as lucky with my stepson 0 -
Better news than the 10,000 post mark, a lost loved one returning, that is GREAT NEWS. Sounds like you did a good job in raising him, he just didn't realize it. 0 -
I congratulate you. I know pretty much how you feel. I adopted three girls when I married and when they were 5, 7, and 8 my ex moved 6 hours away. She was ...difficult is a nice way to put it...about visitation and I thougth that the girls would drift away from me for sure as I only saw them once or twice per year. (and before you say it...southern Indiana courts are not very friendly in this situation).
I had one move in with me when she was 17 and the other moved up here this year with her husband. Since they turned about 16 they put their foot down and called me nearly every day and visited ME when they got their freedom. I have been present for the birth of all 5 of my grandkids and get so much pleasure from just being a dad. Makes it worth the tough times and tough decisions.
Anyway...enough about me...congrats to you again. Sounds like you not only did the right thing at the time...but managed to get him to listen enough to understand it later. Not an easy accomplishment.0
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