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Marriage joke

ljwrench
A young lady came home from a date, rather sad.
>
>She told her mother, "Anthony proposed to me an hour ago."
>
>"Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked.
>
>"Because he also told me he is an atheist. Mom, he doesn't
>even believe there's a Hell."
>
>Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of
>us, we'll show him how wrong he is."
>

"Sell not virtue to purchase wealth, not liberty to purchase power."
Benjamin Franklin, 1785
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Comments

3 comments

Date Votes
  • ljwrench
    As a special part of Sunday's service, the minister asked Ralph on his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he managed to stay married to the same woman all these years. Ralph replied to the audience, "Well, I've treated her well, spent money on her, but mostly I took her traveling on special occasions." The minister inquired "Trips to where?" "For our 25th anniversary, I took her to Italy." The minister then said, "Ralph, you are a terrific example to all husbands. Please tell the audience what you are planning for your wife on your 50th anniversary?" Ralph said, "I'm gonna go get her."
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  • ljwrench
    A couple was engaged for awhile decided to tie the knot and get married. On the wedding night the couple was getting ready for bed and the bride told her new husband there would be no sex unless he paid for it. The husband was astonished, because the told his new bride she was OK before the marriage with sex so what was the problem. She told him $50 bucks everytime he wanted sex. No negotiation. Hubby paid her and the marriage went on for 50 yrs. So on the 50th anniversary the wife took her husband downtown. She said she had a surprise for him. He couldn't wait to see what it was. The
    wife told him she had saved all the $50 dollars everytime they had sex and invested it in a very nice building downtown and it was totally paid for. He was furious... His reply to her was IF I knew you were going to invest that money I would have gave you all my business.
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  • ljwrench
    There was a large marriage counseling seminar held one day and the men were separated from the women. At the mens group, the speaker asked the men, "How many of you have sex with your wife at least twice a week?" About half of the men raised their hand. "Okay, how many of you have sex with your wife once a week?" Hands were raised. "Twice a month?" he asked. Even fewer hands were raised. "Once a month?" Fewer hands still.

    He then asked, "How about once a year?". A man jumped up in the back and yelled, "Me, me, me". The speaker chuckled and asked, "Why are you so excited about that?" The man replied, "Tonights the night!!!".
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