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Strange day today.

Cutiegirlracing
My parents, dad and step mom, yesterday took all the pictures of my son's dad, I had in a trunk.
They took all the pictures out of the frames. They took the frames and put pictures of my son, me, them, my sister, my mom etc, and put all these pictures and hung them up in the hall way.
It looks great. I've been too busy to hang pictures and this is a very nice thing for them to do.
But I wish they wouldn't have used those frames. I don't want to display my son's dad pictures, but I didn't want them out of the frames either.
I would have brought new frames for the new pictures, but not it's too late now.
I'm thinking about buying new frames for my son's dad pictures, but I really just didn't want my son's dad's pictures touch.
I don't know if I should put them back in the old frames and buy new ones or what.
This is such a little thing to anyone else, but to me it's a huge deal or I guess at least it's a big deal or should it be?
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Comments

16 comments

Date Votes
  • tomahawk
    something tells me for you to wait until after christmas[;)][:D]
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  • Marc1301
    All a matter of how YOU feel.
    Seems like you want to put them back where they were, and buy new ones for the others,.........do it, or you will think about it every time you see the old frames.
    IMHO[;)]
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  • tazzer
    +1 but I think you should keep some of yours sons dads pic. out or at least let him keep one in his room. just my thoughts
    best wishes
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  • Cutiegirlracing
    quote:Originally posted by Marc1301
    All a matter of how YOU feel.
    Seems like you want to put them back where they were, and buy new ones for the others,.........do it, or you will think about it every time you see the old frames.
    IMHO[;)]


    I didn't realize it buy yeah. Everytime I see these frames I know what picture goes in which, so I will see the frame and remember the pictures. It's strange to see different pictures in the frames
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  • dongizmo
    You just bought the house, there will be time down the road to make changes like this.
    Relax.
    Don
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  • fishermanben
    You know where their intentions are. Your family has you completely in mind, and they love you even though they just don't understand.

    Get new frames. Put the old pictures back in the old frames, or even into photo albums, and give away the old frames.

    Ben
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  • slipgate
    Did you get your new windows yet?
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  • HandgunHTR52
    CGR - It may have been a subtle hint about moving on as well. While it is right and proper to remember those we have lost, it is not healthy to obsess about them. I am not accusing you of anything as I do not know you at all, but I have seen quite a few postings where you state that you miss him greatly. Once again, I understand that completely, but it makes me wonder if your family isn't trying to send a message.
    I could be completely off base here, but removing pictures of a lost love and replacing them with loved ones that are alive sounds like a signal to me.
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  • Permanently deleted user
    I can understand why they did what they did, but I do not think they had the right to do it. They probably want you to move on, but your son's father will always be part of you...and your son...and your lives. I pray that you will have wisdom in dealing with this.
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  • He Dog
    Grief is odd in how it impacts some people one way and other people other way. There is really no predicting how it will hit us and how long it will take to run its course. Psychologically speaking, it is probably a good idea to move on a little before you think you are ready. If you wait until it is comfortable, you have probably found a way not to move on at all. Odd as it may feel, I think they have done you a favor.
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  • br549
    i'd tell them to mind their own business, and leave what you have alone. when you are ready to change things you will decide when and what. if it offends them so be it . it's your life they'll get over it. they shouldn't be going through your stuff anyway, it means something to you, not them.I lost someone long ago ain't got over it yet and don't expect to.
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  • guntech59
    Cgr, I have read several (well, at least two that I can remember) posts about you being upset at your family members because they are intruding into your personal life. I understand that they are your family and they love you BUT, it seems to me that you need to set some boundaries. You are an adult now, right? (I don't know how old you are but, you do have your own house, right?) Maybe they are having a hard time handling that.

    It sounds to me that you are TOTALLY capable of handling most things life throws your way and grown up enough to ask for help when you really need it. I get this just from your words on the forum. iI wish you well in making them "get it".
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  • Queen of Swords
    Why do you not want to display pictures of your son's father? In spite of the fact that your son never knew him, he still needs to know and have some TANGIBLE evidence of who he was and where the boy came from.
    I understand that it might be difficult for you so have such visual reminders around, for whatever reason, I do not know the circumstances of you and your son's father's relationship.
    I'm thinking your parnets and step parents did so with good intentions. You need to talk to them honestly about where your head is at.
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  • tomahawk
    want me to get you a picture of zulu, one look at them ears and your pa will put everything the way you want it and leave you be[;)][:D][:D][:o)]



    just trying to cheer you up[8D]
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  • mateomasfeo
    quote:Originally posted by slipgate
    Did you get your new windows yet?


    I was thinking the same thing.

    I would whomp some ass...
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  • Cutiegirlracing
    I did get all new windows. I also was right in wanting to save money for unexpected surprises. After I got the windows, we found some of the floors had water damage and had to be replaced. I kept the windows anyway, but I was right and my step mom was wrong!!!

    I've been looking at the pictures and it's still kind of strange seeing other pictures in those frames.
    Sometimes when things seem to get too much I would look though the pictures and have a good cry. Then I would feel better and go on.
    So when I see those frames, I get that sad feeling.
    But I've decided I'm going to leave things alone and just deal with the old frame new pic, thing.

    I really can't get mad at my parents they meant well. I put the pictures of my son's dad in a box that my great granpa made. So that's cool. Then I put them back in my trunk and lock the dam thing.
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