The Plan
In the beginning there was the plan.
And then came the assumptions.
And the assumptions were without form.
And the plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the face of the workers, and
they spoke among themselves, saying, "It is a crock of
s##t, and it stinks."
And the workers went unto their supervisors and
said, "It is a pail
of dung, and we can't live with the smell."
And the supervisors went unto their managers,
saying, "It is a container of excrement, and it is
very strong, such that none may abide by it."
And the managers went unto their vice presidents,
saying, "It is a
vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its
strength."
And the vice presidents spoke among themselves,
saying to one
another, "It contains that which aids plant growth,
and it is very strong."
And the vice president went to the president,
saying unto him, "It
promotes growth, and it is very powerful."
And the president went to the board of directors,
saying unto them, "This new plan will actively promote
the growth and vigor of the company with very powerful
effects."
And the board of directors looked upon the plan and
saw that it was good.
And the plan became policy.
And this, my friend, is how s##t happens.
[:)][:D][8D][}:)][:p][;)][^]
It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open cans.
We got rid of the kids. The cat was allergic.
ATF,Eagle Guns
And then came the assumptions.
And the assumptions were without form.
And the plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the face of the workers, and
they spoke among themselves, saying, "It is a crock of
s##t, and it stinks."
And the workers went unto their supervisors and
said, "It is a pail
of dung, and we can't live with the smell."
And the supervisors went unto their managers,
saying, "It is a container of excrement, and it is
very strong, such that none may abide by it."
And the managers went unto their vice presidents,
saying, "It is a
vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its
strength."
And the vice presidents spoke among themselves,
saying to one
another, "It contains that which aids plant growth,
and it is very strong."
And the vice president went to the president,
saying unto him, "It
promotes growth, and it is very powerful."
And the president went to the board of directors,
saying unto them, "This new plan will actively promote
the growth and vigor of the company with very powerful
effects."
And the board of directors looked upon the plan and
saw that it was good.
And the plan became policy.
And this, my friend, is how s##t happens.
[:)][:D][8D][}:)][:p][;)][^]
It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open cans.
We got rid of the kids. The cat was allergic.
ATF,Eagle Guns
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THE PLAN
A.. Back off and let those men who want to marry men, marry men.
B.. Allow those women who want to marry women, marry women.
C.. Allow those folks who want to abort their babies, abort their babies.
D.. In three generations, there will be no Democrats.
Damn - I love it when a plan comes together.0 -
I'm not the Author of this!
1) "The US will apologize to the world for our "interference" in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those "good 'ole' boys", we will never "interfere" again.
2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea, the Middle East, and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.
3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave.We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them.
4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available
to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.
5) No foreign "students" over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "D" and it's back home baby.
6) The US will make a strong effort
to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while .
7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)
8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not "interfere." They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given
to the army. The people who need
it most get very little, if anything.
9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.
10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH...learn it...or LEAVE...Now, isn't that a winner of a plan?
"The Statue of Liberty is no longer
saying "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses." She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'you want a piece of me?' "0 -
THE PLAN
A.. Back off and let those men who want to marry men, marry men.
B.. Allow those women who want to marry women, marry women.
C.. Allow those folks who want to abort their babies, abort their babies.
D.. In three generations, there will be no Democrats.
Damn - I love it when a plan comes together.0 -
Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down and
decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight.
They would have 5 years to breed the best fighting dog in the world and
whichever side's dog won would be entitled to dominate the world.
Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the
world and bred them with the meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the
biggest and strongest puppy from the litter, and removed his siblings, which
gave him all the milk.
After 5 years, they came up with the biggest, meanest dog the world had ever
seen. Its cage needed steel bars that were 2" thick and nobody could get
near it. When the day came for the dog fight, Bush showed up with a strange
looking animal. It was a 9 foot long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for Bush
because there was no way that this dog could possibly last 10 seconds with
the Afghani dog.
When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of it's cage, and
slowly waddled over towards Osama's dog.
Osama's dog snarled and leaped out of its cage and charged the American
Dachshund---but when it got close enough to bite, the Dachshund opened its
mouth and consumed Osama's dog in one bite. There was nothing left of
Osama's dog at all.
Osama came up to Bush, shaking his head in disbelief, "We don't understand
how this could have happened. We had our best people working for 5 years
with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and the
biggest, meanest Siberian wolves."
"That's nothing,", said Bush. "We had Michael Jackson's plastic surgeons
working for 5 years to make that alligator look like a weenie dog."
Then said he unto them, But now, he that hath a purse, let him take it, and likewise his scrip: And he that hath no sword,let him sell his garment, and buy one0 -
[:D][:D][}:)][8D][:0] 0 -
And don't forget that we can say all of this with a mouth full, and a full belly because we own the worlds food supply. 0 -
Throw in mandatory 1 or 2 years military service for all 18 year old males who are not in college or trade school (get these young men back on track) and I think you'll have it. 0 -
I prefer the "God will know his own" plan [}:)] 0 -
wish that a presidential candidate had this on his agenda....GET MY VOTE 0
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