Wal-Mart Urine Test
In the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . A lot cheaper than a doctor."
S o, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.
He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart"
That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some ta p water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.
Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.
It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . A lot cheaper than a doctor."
S o, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.
He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:
"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart"
That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some ta p water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.
Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.
0
-
[:D][:D][:D][:D][:D] 0 -
What else did Hairy find out. [:D][:D][:D] 0 -
Good one 2-barrel,wish I had said it. 0 -
[:D][:D][:D] 0 -
Very old joke, I always heard it was an oil test machine that was cheaper than the mechanic, the daughter was pregnant, and I don't remember what was with the wife.
But, still cute. [:)]0 -
[:D][:D][:D] 0 -
[:D][:D][:D][:D] 0 -
Old or not made me chuckle 0 -
Good one. [:p] 0 -
quote:Originally posted by 41 nut
Good one. [:p]
Yep.0 -
[:D][8D][:)][:0][:0] 0 -
LOL! 0 -
Best thing I've heard today! 0 -
[:0][:D][:D][:D] 0 -
[:D][:D][:D][:D] 0
Please sign in to leave a comment.
Comments
15 comments