"OLD" IS WHEN
"OLD" IS WHEN . Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Pick one; I can't do both!"
"OLD " IS WHEN ... Your friends compliment you on your new alli gator shoes and you're barefoot.
"OLD" IS WHEN . A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door..
"OLD" IS WHEN .... Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
"OLD" IS WHEN .. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
"OLD" IS WHEN .... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
"OLD" IS WHEN "Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today
"OLD" IS WHEN .... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
"OLD" IS WHEN . An "all nighter" means not getting up to use the bathroom.
"OLD " IS WHEN ... Your friends compliment you on your new alli gator shoes and you're barefoot.
"OLD" IS WHEN . A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door..
"OLD" IS WHEN .... Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
"OLD" IS WHEN .. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
"OLD" IS WHEN .... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
"OLD" IS WHEN "Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today
"OLD" IS WHEN .... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
"OLD" IS WHEN . An "all nighter" means not getting up to use the bathroom.
0
-
Middle age is five years older than you are today.
"Old" comes after that.
Naturally, I am still approaching middle age.0 -
Damn it...almost swatted the monitor...
those darn insect sig pics!!![}:)]0 -
[:D][:D] not quite there yet 0 -
[:D][:D] 0 -
I'm there. 0 -
Not there yet, but I have seen that side of the hill from still idling on the top.[:D] 0 -
Old is when a beautiful waitress brings your food and you look at the food instead of her boobs. 0 -
quote:Originally posted by Rosie
Old is when a beautiful waitress brings your food and you look at the food instead of her boobs.
That's not old, that's UNAMERICAN![:D]0 -
Old is when you know the local mortician by name. Funny he never says "HI" Just asks, "How ya doing" and smiles. 0 -
About 3 years ago. 0 -
I'm looking at the old side of the hill,
trouble is I'm looking up at it.0 -
1. You and your teeth don't sleep together.
2. Your try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any.
3. At the breakfast table you hear "snap, crackle, pop" and you're not eating cereal.
4. Your back goes out but you stay home.
5. When you wake up looking like your driver's license picture.
6. It takes two tries to get up from the couch.
7. When your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.
8. When happy hour is a nap.
9. When you're on vacation and your energy runs out before your money does..
10. When you say something to your kids that your mother said to you and you always hated it.
11. When all you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.
12. When you step off a curb and look down one more time to make sure the street is still there.
13. Your idea of weight lifting is standing up.
14. It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired
15. Your memory is shorter and your complaining lasts longer.
16. Your address book has mostly names that start with Dr.
17. You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
18. The pharmacist has become your new best friend.
19. Getting "lucky" means you found your car in the parking lot.
20. The twinkle in your eye is merely a reflection from the sun on your bifocals.
21. It takes twice as long - to look half as good.
22. Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt - doesn't work.
23. You look for your glasses for half an hour and they were on your head the whole time.
24. You sink your teeth into a steak - and they stay there.
25. You give up all your bad habits and still don't feel good.
26. You have more patience, but it is actually that you just don't care anymore.
27. You finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
28. You wonder how you could be over the hill when you don't even remember being on top of it.0 -
AN OLD MAN ONCE SAID .
WHEN I WAS YOUNGER EVERY BONE IN MY BODY WAS LIMBER/////// BUT /////// 1.[^]
NOW EVERY BONE IN MY BODY IS HARD//////// BUT /////// 1.[:(]0 -
quote:Originally posted by CHEVELLE427
"OLD" IS WHEN . Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Pick one; I can't do both!"Just one of the many reasons I'd never own a multistory dwelling![:D]0
Please sign in to leave a comment.
Comments
14 comments