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Sleep, who needs it?

bigdaddyjunior
Yep, I have developed a system where I take naps when there isn't much going on, like when I'm driving or my wife is giving me "the List"or the kids are explaining in painful detail exactly why they need $20 each to see some movie, buy a DVD or CD so they won't be left in the social dust come Monday at school. Yep, plenty of otherwise wasted time to catch five minutes here and ten there. I also have this couch laying thing I do to relax in front of the TV. Everyone thinks I am asleep because of the drooling and snoring and in the American Male position of repose which has the left hand in the waistband and the right over the heart. I have studied this phenomenon and determined that it is the result of an inborn desire of the American Male, incase he should die in his sleep, to go out a patriot with his balls intact. Couch laying in front of the TV can not be confused with actual sleeping, just try to change the channel or adjust the volume and I'll instantly holler,"Hey, I was watching that." Doesn't matter that the hunting show ended two hours ago and Martha Stewart is now on showing how to properly fluff a pillow. So, I don't really sleep at night very much. I figure if it is night time here then it is daytime in China or some other godless wasteland bent on our destruction and they are all up and doing who knows what to instigate our demise. Plus it takes years and years of lack of REM sleep to develop the acuity of mind that only a deep seated psychosis can bring. That sharpness should give us the edge we need. When they come it will be under the cover of darkness. Won't they be surprised when instead of a country asleep they find a bunch of psychotic patriots holding their balls, ever vigilant.
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Comments

6 comments

Date Votes
  • MVP
    I see you woke up long enough to make another post[:D]

    asleepat_the_wheel.jpg
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  • bigdaddyjunior
    Yep, one of my naps when things were slow on GB. Actually, this is how I make my posts since my fingers are too large to press single keys.
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  • wundudnee
    I've simplified it, I eat till I'm sleepy, then I sleep till I'm hungry. That keeps me busy and it seems to work for me.
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  • zipperzap
    Naps are great - I had more time for naps when I was retired. Now there is more creativity involved.[:D]
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  • bgjohn
    I sleep until I have to PISS![:(]
    JM[|)]
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  • 1911a1-fan
    quote:American Male position of repose which has the left hand in the waistband and the right over the heart. I have studied this phenomenon and determined that it is the result of an inborn desire of the American Male, incase he should die in his sleep, to go out a patriot with his balls intact.

    i believe it is the tingling feeling myself but from now on i'll go with your excuse[:)]
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