Skip to main content
Help Center Community Shop

waterboarding can't be too bad

buschmaster
had a stuffy nose. put a heating pad on it. not good enough. I wanted hot water. so I got in the tub with hot water and put a soaking wet washcloth on my face. not good enough.

got a cup and kept pouring hot water on it. not good enough.

got a straw and submerged underwater. breathed through the straw. water too shallow. not good enough.

the other end of the tub by the faucet is deeper, so I figured I'd put my head underwater over there. easier said than done. feels like I'm laying downhill and there isn't any leg room, had to put my feet up on the wall to get my head under the faucet and this dang thing is way slipperier than I thought. pinched my nose, closed my eyes, put the straw in my mouth, and submerged. definitely deeper.

it was going okay for a while, breathing slowly through the straw and exhaling rapidly to continue breathing through the straw so I wouldn't suffocate. then the inevitable happened. water got in my nose, went straight down my throat and I choked and coughed. jumped up to get my head out of the water but only went BONK the sharp edges of the faucet dug into the top of my scalp. repeated attempts only resulted in repeated bonkings.

after a struggle I got past the faucet, but trying to sit up (from laying downhill with my feet up the wall in a slippery tub) cracked the back of my head on the faucet a few times before I got my feet down and hands under me and could finally sit up straight and finish coughing.

went back to the heating pad.

waterboarding can't be too bad. they could beat you on the head with a faucet to make it more realistic.
0

Comments

12 comments

Date Votes
  • Brookwood
    Never heard of hot water submersion for a runny nose. Next time I suggest you just get out the super high power blow drier.

    Or the shop heat gun, but be careful as them things get hot enough to cook eggs! or burn toast! :shock:

    Or.....you could just snort some of that hot pepper dust! :o
    0
  • Mobuck
    Sounds like you need one of those nasal flush thingies. Way better than the event described(although I've not actually tried either).
    0
  • nmyers
    Um, actually, waterboarding is worse. And, it can be fatal, especially with older subjects. Best to stick to OTC decongestant & Sinus Rinse or a neti pot.

    Neal
    0
  • Bubba Jr.
    My sinuses are all screwed up. My nose is either running or my nasal passages are swollen shut. I finally found something that really works to open up my nose. It's called Vicks Sinex Severe. It comes in a bottle with an ultra fine mist pump. One squirt up each nostril and about 5-6 minutes later I'm breathing just fine. :D:D
    0
  • KenK/84Bravo
    It might be a slightly different experience when your wrists and ankles are zip tied to a chair, and you can not come for air, when you want to.

    The feeling of helplessness/hopelessness comes to mind, and increases the anxiety and fear level exponentially, when you are not in control of the situation.
    0
  • us55840
    Nilmed sinus rinse works good. And so does Flonase over the counter nasal spray.

    Ultimate remedy ...... sinus surgery! that is what I finally opted for and made a world of difference.

    IN layman terms: the nasal roto rooter job! :D
    0
  • buschmaster
    Bubba Jr. wrote:
    My sinuses are all screwed up. My nose is either running or my nasal passages are swollen shut. I finally found something that really works to open up my nose. It's called Vicks Sinex Severe. It comes in a bottle with an ultra fine mist pump. One squirt up each nostril and about 5-6 minutes later I'm breathing just fine. :D:D
    dude I used to work with used Afrin. snorted it. constantly. told him someday they're going to find him dead on a couch with empty bottles of Afrin all over the place.
    0
  • buschmaster
    nmyers wrote:
    Um, actually, waterboarding is worse. And, it can be fatal, especially with older subjects. Best to stick to OTC decongestant & Sinus Rinse or a neti pot.

    Neal

    okay. I'll stick to decongestants. :D
    0
  • 338magnut
    buschmaster I got to admit this was a funny story could almost imagine the scene the way you described it couldn't stop laughing. You should write comedy. Also hope you get over your cold.
    0
  • hillbille
    338magnut wrote:
    buschmaster I got to admit this was a funny story could almost imagine the scene the way you described it couldn't stop laughing. You should write comedy. Also hope you get over your cold.


    sounds more like one of Kasey's stories/escapades......... though I do feel for you, it ain't no fun when you can't breath
    0
  • buschmaster
    Brookwood wrote:
    Never heard of hot water submersion for a runny nose. Next time I suggest you just get out the super high power blow drier.

    Or the shop heat gun, but be careful as them things get hot enough to cookTr or burn toast! :shock:

    Or.....you could just snort some of that hot pepper dust! :o

    that's a good idea. have an 1875 watt Revlon and a 1200 watt Sears Mini Turbo (travel dryer) from 1978 or something. this is worth experimenting with.

    hair-dryers.jpg

    tried the Revlon on low. it cuts the heat at low fan speed. just a little warm and 2" from my nose.

    put it on medium. still not hot enough considering how much wind you get.

    put it on hi. strips off paint if it gets too close. too much wind.

    any of those settings dries out my nose.

    tried the Mini Turbo. forkin' loud (it's a turbo all right) and surprisingly it puts out the same heat as the Revlon at low and medium speeds. can't keep up with it on hi though.

    conclusion: hair dryer will work if that's all ya got. still prefer a heating pad.
    0
  • buschmaster
    338magnut wrote:
    buschmaster I got to admit this was a funny story could almost imagine the scene the way you described it couldn't stop laughing. You should write comedy. Also hope you get over your cold.
    yup, that's why I got up off my ass and wrote about it. thought it would be funny.
    0

Please sign in to leave a comment.

Recent Activity