Couples and finances in the 21st Century
Many years ago I went to couples counseling with a lady I was seeing and planning to cohabit with. The counselor had two very important pieces of advice: 1) her kids were already almost raised and I should not attempt to fill a parental role with them. 2) Keep the finances separate.
I started seeing my wife 4 years ago, we've been married for a year and 5 days.
She thinks it's strange for us to keep our finances separate. I don't at all. We each pay half of most of the expenses, property tax, house insurance, car insurance, utilities, necessities for the (many) pets, but I don't keep track of groceries or eating out.
I figure this is really saving us from arguing about money since she donates to wildlife rescues that save critters many people eat, she spoils her grand kids something awful, and she generally just doesn't keep track of money very well at all. I buy firearms and related things, donate to GOA, build the wall, and other things she doesn't care about.
I totally get that many couples have a single bank account and joint credit cards but I think separate works better for us.
I started seeing my wife 4 years ago, we've been married for a year and 5 days.
She thinks it's strange for us to keep our finances separate. I don't at all. We each pay half of most of the expenses, property tax, house insurance, car insurance, utilities, necessities for the (many) pets, but I don't keep track of groceries or eating out.
I figure this is really saving us from arguing about money since she donates to wildlife rescues that save critters many people eat, she spoils her grand kids something awful, and she generally just doesn't keep track of money very well at all. I buy firearms and related things, donate to GOA, build the wall, and other things she doesn't care about.
I totally get that many couples have a single bank account and joint credit cards but I think separate works better for us.
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IMHO, when it comes to marriages late in life where there are raised children from previous spouses, it is not only smart to keep things separate, but to also have a pre-nuptial agreement. I have seen quite a few autumn marriages ruined by adult children! 0 -
Ms WT and I do not mingle our finances. She has SS and govt retirement. I have SS, Marine retirement and my investments.
I own the property outright.
She transfers 650 per month to my account. That?s about half of the monthly and yearly costs. I farm that out to a dozen or so sub accounts that are used to pay insurance, taxes, home repairs, cable n internet, electric, etc... when due.
She uses her money to buy whatever she wants - I don?t even comment. I use mine however I see fit.
No need to mingle finances in this day and age.0 -
Ive never been in your shoes.
My wife is a stay at home mom- we are one bank account and always have been.0 -
We have separate checking and savings accounts, but all of them fall under our trust. That way, if either of us dies, the other has full access to all the accounts. Ditto all the property.
We share expenses about equally, and alternate paying the income taxes. She gets her pension, SS, and an annuity. I get my three and all go into our separate checking accounts by direct deposit. It works for us.0 -
my wife and I marred at 21. Our money from our jobs all went to the same bank account. Even before we had kids and we decided she stay at home with them we were like that. I suppose we are just vary traditional i guess. 0
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