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Ma and the outhouse

jwb267
Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she hollers out.... "Pa, you need to go out and fix the outhouse!"

Pa replies, "There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse."

Ma yells back, "Yes there is; now git out there and fix it."

So.......Pa mosies out to the outhouse, looks around and yells back, "Ma There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse! "

Ma replies, "Stick yur head in the hole!"

Pa yells back, "I ain't stickin my head in that hole!"

Ma says, "Ya have to stick yur head in the hole to see what to fix."

So with that, Pa sticks his head in the hole, looks around and yells back,"Ma - There ain't nuthin wrong with this outhouse!"

Ma hollers back, "Now take your head out of the hole!"

Pa proceeds to pull his head out of the hole, and then starts yelling, "Ma - Help! My beard is stuck in the cracks in the toilet seat!"

To which Ma replies, "Hurts, don't it?"
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Comments

18 comments

Date Votes
  • Grasshopper
    [:)][8D]
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  • select-fire
    [:)]
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  • Horse Plains Drifter
    [:D][:D]
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  • wundudnee
    My Mom was a clean outhouse believer and had installed linoleum on the seat. It was pretty deluxe, but you really had to go before you would sit down on it when it was less than about 20 degrees.[:0]
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  • TooBig
    [:)][:D][:p][^][xx(]
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  • scooterdriver
    Been there...always hated the late night call of nature in the middle of winter...and still wonder why it was a two-holer for just our one family.
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  • TooBig
    [:)][:D][:p][^][xx(]
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  • TooBig
    [:)][:D][:p][^][xx(]
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  • danielgage
    [:D]
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  • dpmule
    Always be the second user on cold mornings....

    Let the first get the frost knocked off and the seat warmed up..



    Mule
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  • montanajoe
    • Community moderator
    [:D][:D]
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  • pulsarnc
    Growing up I ha some schoolmates whiles family had a six hole outhouse . I am all in favor of family togetherness but that is pushing it to the extreme !
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  • Bubba Jr.
    I can still remember tearing out the pages of the Sears catalog and wadding them up over and over to soften them at Grandpa's house. I really hated it when it was snowing and windy and cold. [:0]
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  • pulsarnc
    My father related the follows story about outhouses Traveling thru the country to visit some girls one day he became stuck in the snow .As he and his buddy were digging out the old ford they observed an old man enter the outhouse across the field from where they were stuck . Now those of us who have any experience without houses know that every so often you have to ? burnout?the spiders . For this reason the back side of the outhouse is usually open . As they are digging out the car they see the wife of the House come out with some corn shucks tied to a stick . Apparently unaware of her husbands presence on the throne she proceeds to light the corn shucks on fire and inserts them into the opening provided for this . In short order they see the door fly open and the old man was exits rapidly to sit in a bank of snow Daddy cannot hear clearly what is said but he said the old mans ire was unmistakable . This was around 1940
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  • Okie743
    AND

    Halloween night was an invitation (excuse) turn over the outhouses. (especially around town)


    Thought for the day:
    A group of Monkeys is called a Congress.

    I would add it can now be called a Democrat congress. (but that would degrading to the group of real monkeys and get peta involved and protesting)
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  • Mobuck
    "Growing up I ha some schoolmates whiles family had a six hole outhouse"

    They must have had a lot of fried chicken(fried in lard). You can nearly set a clock by how long that takes to work it's way through.
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  • bearman49709
    quote:Originally posted by Okie743
    AND

    Halloween night was an invitation (excuse) turn over the outhouses. (especially around town.

    More fun to just move them back about four feet.
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  • Okie743
    quote:Originally posted by bearman49709
    quote:Originally posted by Okie743
    AND

    Halloween night was an invitation (excuse) turn over the outhouses. (especially around town.

    More fun to just move them back about four feet.


    We never thought of that one or we would have done such. We had to be careful and not do anything that would bring out the big leather strap across our behinds. (now that brings new meaning to the term, livin on the edge)

    But it was a small town and everyone knew most likely who was doing such so we had to be careful and not push our luck being onery.
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