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Irish Wake: not a great idea when on pain meds

mrmike08075
My uncle Tom passed on Friday - military funeral on Monday with a color guard and electronic bugler (thank you American legion)

Last night I attended the south Philly Irish wake...

While I only spent 3 hours there it was physically challenging for me (especially if you add in the ride there and back)

The event was held in the downtown club (no longer open to the public) after a larger gathering in a boxing club

Priests and cops and firemen and veterans of all stripes

Gaelic was spoken by some - photos of a relative killed in a small disturbance between some good Irish lads and the British army at a post office in Ireland were displayed

I smoked from a pipe passed around (family tradition from county cork) and limited myself to 3 shots of the brown upon call for salutations and respect

I thought that while I am obviously a fool I showed some restraint

But it was a tough wake up this morning - a tough morning over all

God bless Tom

Mike
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Comments

6 comments

Date Votes
  • Ditch-Runner
    sorry for your loss sounds like a good felow



    my southern family use too ( maybe still do It's been 20 or 30 years since I was in contact with any of them ) they have wakes bring the body home for the night everyone gathers around tells stories and says there good buys
    next day off to the grave yard .
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  • mrmike08075
    My Dad's side of the family is old school hardcore Irish Catholic

    One brother is a fireman - one a police officer - one a bartender - one a priest - all army vets...

    My female cousins go to Ireland and bring back a husband (several have)...

    I used to go to the homecoming or thanksgiving day northeast Catholic high school home football games with them...

    There is a bit of the quiet man going on there.

    Franks black cherry wishniak pony keg...

    Mike
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  • Ditch-Runner
    your good man enduring a day or so in pain to show respect

    sad is how the Irish were treated when they started coming in to the country it was said as much as blacks were hated families preferred the girls to marry a black that a Irish man

    part of my history I know were Scotch Irish settled in Tennessee
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  • mrmike08075
    It was a bit surreal as he died from lung cancer (multiple pack a day smoker since highschool)

    And there is always a vibe or undercurrent of "that poor buzzard he has cancer" whispered between folks

    And there are the people who cannot or do not want to speak with you or make contact with you -who don't know what to say or who act like cancer is contagious

    Or somebody says you look good - it's great that you finally lost all that weight - I need to lose like 20 lbs and I go to the gym but I can't seem to get rid of that spare tire - what worked for you???

    Oh you know I tried Atkins and I like the weight watchers point system - but I really recommend the chemotherapy plan cause your body just seems to eat the fat right off of you - and with the radiation treatment diet the pounds just melt away - persistent vomiting seems to keep the food from going right to your waist line...

    But you get used to ignoring that type of person.

    Being an Irish wake once people had gotten liquored up most Irishmen have zero filter or political correctness left - it's refreshing and preferable to get frank and direct inquiries rather than those who dance around it or tread lightly or act like you are already dead and avoid you or don't see you

    And then you dance with the widow to a slow song that lasts a long time - and you lie to her and tell her the pain meds work and there is no suffering or fear or terror

    And she knows your lying but genuinely appreciates the effort

    And you resist the urge to tell the members of the cloth that god's garden is full of weeds or ask him why his god kills little children with cancer

    But it's not about me so I suck it up and offer what support or tribute I can provide

    Mike
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  • wpage
    When our Irish uncle Tom died. My brother joked the diference between a Irish wedding and a Irish funeral is one less drunk.

    No one laughed.
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  • mrmike08075
    For some reason lost to history...

    At wakes - in this case Irish wakes - the men of the family will come together and sing "Michael row the boat ashore".

    Some of my earliest memories revolve around this practice.

    I remember at age 11 or 12 getting the talk from my grandmother - that my being an alter boy and a boy scout and having part time and summer jobs - having already received my confirmation in the Roman Catholic Church that I would now be attending wakes and called upon to be a pall barer - that I would no longer be seated at the children's table during holidays or special events.

    For some reason it was important for me to learn the words to that song - and upon attending my first Irish wake joining the men of the family in song. It had a powerful impact on me then...

    And it had a powerful impact on me again at Uncle Tom's wake.

    There is always someone with a guitar - this time a hofner bass guitar when we men rejoice and sing.

    The song - packing / filling / lighting the pipe - placing a coin on a grave marker after visiting - how to shoot the brown - taping a keg - rights of passage into adulthood.

    Mike
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