Squirrel Causes Accident?
PHILADELPHIA (KYW/CNN) ? A driver blamed a furry woodland creature after he smashed into a row of parked cars in Philadelphia, according to an eyewitness.
Police were called after the vehicle went out of control and hit several parked cars and rolled onto its side early Monday morning.
Emergency responders pulled the uninjured driver out through his windshield.
One eyewitness said the driver had an odd explanation for the accident.
"He said he was coming down the street and he saw a squirrel. He thought he was going to hit it, so he swerved and he lost control," the witness said.
There's no word from police on whether the squirrel was really a factor, or whether the driver is expected to face any charges.
LINK
http://www.kltv.com/story/39022839/driver-blames-squirrel-for-rollover-crash-eyewitness-says
Police were called after the vehicle went out of control and hit several parked cars and rolled onto its side early Monday morning.
Emergency responders pulled the uninjured driver out through his windshield.
One eyewitness said the driver had an odd explanation for the accident.
"He said he was coming down the street and he saw a squirrel. He thought he was going to hit it, so he swerved and he lost control," the witness said.
There's no word from police on whether the squirrel was really a factor, or whether the driver is expected to face any charges.
LINK
http://www.kltv.com/story/39022839/driver-blames-squirrel-for-rollover-crash-eyewitness-says
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Sure hope the person had "Farmers" insurance! [:D]
"We know a thing or two, because we've seen a thing or two" [:0]
Ba Ba Bum Bum Dum Dum Dum0 -
Speaking of Squirrels I saw a white squirrel running around just outside of the town of Brevard. They are not albino they have dark eyes. Pretty cool to see one. 0 -
I brake for squirrels. 0 -
Squirrel lives matter. 0 -
I absolutely do not try to avoid squirrels. They will run out,stop, wait, then reverse direction and if a drivers tries to miss the damn things it would be easy to cause an accident. To the best of my knowledge I have never run over one as they always seem to get out of the way at the last second.I think they do it on purpose.[:)] 0 -
No I never got that drunk. Well that's not true I have actually crawled out of a bar on one occasion but I don't remember ever seeing a 200 pound squirrel. 0 -
I'll bet the guy was leaving a PETA conference and figured it's better to roll/wreck his vehicle and or injure humans than run over one squirrel? No? 0 -
I always keep my steering wheel straight and steady upon a small varmint running out in front of me. Just a little bump in the roadway and on I go. I was trained by the best ex-over the road truck driver\North Star bus driver that ever lived.
He would put his full cup of coffee on the dashboard of the rig I was driving and if a drop was spilled, I was in deep doo doo!0 -
We need to ban Japanese cars if the squirrels continue to escape. [:0] 0 -
https://www.miamiherald.com/living/liv-columns-blogs/dave-barry/article31994121.html
Classic '95: Attack of the killer squirrels
BY DAVE BARRY
September 10, 1995 12:00 AM
This Dave Barry column was originally published Sunday, September 10, 1995
Once again we are forced to ask ourselves, as a society, whether nature should be legal.
Consider a story from the June 22 Manchester (N.H.) Union Leader, written by Paul Tracy and sent in by alert reader Arnie Alpert. This story states that, on June 20, a Laconia, N.H., police officer was called to the municipal water-treatment facility in response to -- and as you read this column, please bear in mind that I am not making ANY of these newspaper quotations up -- "a report of a suspicious-acting woodchuck that would not let people out of the building." The officer sized up the situation and, according to the story, "determined that the animal needed to be euthanized and tried to run it over with his cruiser."
So far, so good. Law-enforcement experts will tell you, after they have had a few belts, that in a situation where a member of the marmot family is holding people hostage in a sewage plant (in police radio code, this is known as a "10-6"), the textbook response is to drive a police car over the alleged perpetrator, then, if necessary, advise it of its rights.
Unfortunately, things did not go exactly according to plan. The story quotes a plant employee as saying: "When he (the officer) got out after running over it (the woodchuck), I think he thought it was dead, then the thing sprung up and attacked him."
At this point the officer -- and if you have never been attacked by a woodchuck, then do not second-guess this decision -- pulled his 9mm pistol and commenced firing.
"We think he emptied a clip," a plant employee is quoted as saying, "but we could only find eight casings on the pavement."
The story states that during the battle, the officer, seeking to escape the woodchuck, "jumped up on the cruiser and injured his knee." Fortunately, before anybody else could be hurt, the woodchuck went to that Big Burrow in the Sky.
I wish I could tell you that this was an isolated incident. I wish I could look you in the eyeball and say, "This was just one lone disgruntled woodchuck, possibly a former postal employee, who fortunately will never again terrorize humanity, thanks to a quick-acting police officer, who fortunately was not carrying nuclear weapons."
But I cannot say that. For one thing, I lack the lung capacity. For another thing, I have here an article from the June 28 Gaithersburg (Md.) Gazette, written by April E. Fulton and sent in by several alert readers, which states: "Nine residents of the South Village area of Montgomery Village -- two adults and seven children -- were playing near Docena Court on the morning of June 15 when they suddenly were charged by a band of about a dozen squirrels."
The article quotes one of the women -- who was bitten on the foot -- as saying: "We were just playing in the yard, like we do every day, and suddenly, out of nowhere, about 12 squirrels started charging us, making these high-pitched, shrill noises." A neighbor is quoted as saying: "The squirrels that day went crazy."
The article states that on June 21, a representative of the Maryland Department of Natural Resources inspected the area and "found no abnormal behavior from the squirrels."
Of course not. They may be squirrels, but they are not stupid. They're not about to go after a government official, not after what happened to the woodchuck. No, they put on a cute little Walt Disney show for the Maryland Department of Natural Resources, squeaking and scampering around with acorns in their cheeks. But you may rest assured that as soon as the coast was clear, they resumed smoking tiny cigarettes and planning their next attack. They will stop at nothing, as we can see from the following headline from a Sept. 2, 1994, front-page article in the Missoula (Mont.) Missoulian, written by Michael Downs and sent in by many alert readers:
FLAMING SQUIRRELS IGNITE FIRE
The story states that "two electrocuted squirrels fell from a power line Thursday morning, their flaming bodies igniting a small grass fire near Tarkio." A fire official is quoted as saying that it could have been a male and a female squirrel engaged in an act of "burning rodent passion." (The fire official does NOT point out that both "Rodent Passion" and "Flaming Squirrels" would be excellent names for rock bands; this was probably just an oversight.)
At this point you're saying: "Dave, you have presented ample journalistic evidence here to prove that the animal kingdom is attempting, for whatever reason, to wipe out the entire human race. But at least members of the news media are safe!"
I wish I could agree, but tragically I cannot -- not in light of a June 21 Associated Press item from Kennewick, Wash., sent in by several alert readers, which begins: "A TV reporter's hair gel apparently attracted a swarm of bees that stung him more than 30 times yesterday." The reporter was doing a story about beekeeping when the attack occurred; the story states that the beekeeper, in an effort to help, covered the reporter's head with a protective hood, but unfortunately the hood "also turned out to contain bees."
I am sure that you, as a person concerned about the First Amendment, have the same reaction to this story as I did, namely: How come this never happens, on-camera, to MY local TV reporters? Until we get solid answers to this and many other questions raised by this column (such as: "Why would anybody print this column?"), I am urging everyone to avoid all contact with nature in any form, including vegetables. Speaking of which, you should also write your congressperson.0 -
Squirrels, no problem, "bump-bump". But-I did total out a pickup on a big oak tree in 1991 by dodging a big ol' buck that jumped off a high shoulder and landed in front of me. I told myself then, I wouldn't try to miss any other animals while driving. That's after I got out of the hospital, the seat belt broke my collarbone. 0 -
I'm gonna' throw this in fer y'alls entertainment.
Neighborhood Hazard (Or: Why the Cops Won't Patrol Brice Street)
I never dreamed slowly cruising through a residential neighborhood could be so incredibly dangerous!
Studies have shown that motorcycling requires more decisions per second, and more sheer data processing than nearly any other common activity or sport. The reactions and accurate decision making abilities needed have been likened to the reactions of fighter pilots! The consequences of bad decisions or poor situational awareness are pretty much the same for both groups too.
Occasionally, as a rider I have caught myself starting to make bad or late decisions while riding. In flight training, my instructors called this being #65533;behind the power curve. It is a mark of experience that when this begins to happen, the rider recognizes the situation, and more importantly, does something about it. A short break, a meal, or even a gas stop can set things right again as it gives the brain a chance to catch up.
Good, accurate, and timely decisions are essential when riding a motorcycle at least if you want to remain among the living. In short, the brain needs to keep up with the machine.
I had been banging around the roads of east Texas and as I headed back into Dallas, found myself in very heavy, high-speed traffic on the freeways. Normally, this is not a problem, I commute in these conditions daily, but suddenly I was nearly run down by a cage that decided it needed my lane more than I did. This is not normally a big deal either, as it happens around here often, but usually I can accurately predict which drivers are not paying attention and avoid them before we are even close. This one I missed seeing until it was nearly too late, and as I took evasive action I nearly broadsided another car that I was not even aware was there!
Two bad decisions and insufficient situational awareness all within seconds. I was behind the power curve. Time to get off the freeway.
I hit the next exit, and as I was in an area I knew pretty well, headed through a few big residential neighborhoods as a new route home. As I turned onto the nearly empty streets I opened the visor on my full-face helmet to help get some air. I figured some slow riding through the quiet surface streets would give me time to relax, think, and regain that edge so frequently required when riding.
Little did I suspect
As I passed an oncoming car, a brown furry missile shot out from under it and tumbled to a stop immediately in front of me. It was a squirrel, and must have been trying to run across the road when it encountered the car. I really was not going very fast, but there was no time to brake or avoid it,it was that close.
I hate to run over animals and I really hate it on a motorcycle, but a squirrel should pose no danger to me. I barely had time to brace for the impact.
Animal lovers, never fear. Squirrels can take care of themselves!
Inches before impact, the squirrel flipped to his feet. He was standing on his hind legs and facing the oncoming Valkyrie with steadfast resolve in his little beady eyes. His mouth opened, and at the last possible second, he screamed and leapt! I am pretty sure the scream was squirrel for, Banzai! or maybe, Die you gravy-sucking, heathen scum! as the leap was spectacular and he flew over the windshield and impacted me squarely in the chest.
Instantly he set upon me. If I did not know better I would have sworn he brought twenty of his little buddies along for the attack. Snarling, hissing, and tearing at my clothes, he was a frenzy of activity. As I was dressed only in a light t-shirt, summer riding gloves, and jeans this was a bit of a cause for concern. This furry little tornado was doing some damage!
Picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a t-shirt, and leather gloves puttering maybe 25mph down a quiet residential street and in the fight of his life with a squirrel. And losing.
I grabbed for him with my left hand and managed to snag his tail. With all my strength I flung the evil rodent off the left of the bike, almost running into the right curb as I recoiled from the throw.
That should have done it. The matter should have ended right there. It really should have. The squirrel could have sailed into one of the pristinely kept yards and gone on about his business, and I could have headed home. No one would have been the wiser.
But this was no ordinary squirrel. This was not even an ordinary pissed-off squirrel.
This was an evil attack squirrel of death!
Somehow he caught my gloved finger with one of his little hands, and with the force of the throw swung around and with a resounding thump and an amazing impact he landed square on my back and resumed his rather anti-social and extremely distracting activities. He also managed to take my left glove with him!
The situation was not improved. Not improved at all. His attacks were continuing, and now I could not reach him.
I was startled to say the least. The combination of the force of the throw, only having one hand (the throttle hand) on the handlebars, and my jerking back unfortunately put a healthy twist through my right hand and into the throttle. A healthy twist on the throttle of a Valkyrie can only have one result. Torque. This is what the Valkyrie is made for, and she is very, very good at it.
The engine roared as the front wheel left the pavement. The squirrel screamed in anger. The Valkyrie screamed in ecstasy. I screamed in, well, I just plain screamed.
Now picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a slightly squirrel torn t-shirt, and only one leather glove roaring at maybe 70mph and rapidly accelerating down a quiet residential street on one wheel and with a demonic squirrel on his back. The man and the squirrel are both screaming bloody murder.
With the sudden acceleration I was forced to put my other hand back on the handlebars and try to get control of the bike. This was leaving the mutant squirrel to his own devices, but I really did not want to crash into somebody's tree, house, or parked car. Also, I had not yet figured out how to release the throttle my brain was just simply overloaded. I did manage to mash the back brake, but it had little affect against the massive power of the big cruiser.
About this time the squirrel decided that I was not paying sufficient attention to this very serious battle (maybe he is a Scottish attack squirrel of death), and he came around my neck and got IN my full-face helmet with me. As the faceplate closed partway and he began hissing in my face I am quite sure my screaming changed tone and intensity. It seemed to have little affect on the squirrel however.
The rpms on The Dragon maxed out (I was not concerned about shifting at the moment) and her front end started to drop.
Now picture the large man on the huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a very ragged torn t-shirt, and wearing one leather glove, roaring at probably 80mph, still on one wheel, with a large puffy squirrel's tail sticking out his mostly closed full-face helmet. By now the screams are probably getting a little hoarse.
Finally I got the upper hand I managed to grab his tail again, pulled him out of my helmet, and slung him to the left as hard as I could. This time it worked, sort-of. Spectacularly sort-of, so to speak.
Picture the scene. You are a cop. You and your partner have pulled off on a quiet residential street and parked with your windows down to do some paperwork.
Suddenly a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a torn t-shirt flapping in the breeze, and wearing one leather glove, moving at probably 80mph on one wheel, and screaming bloody murder roars by and with all his strength throws a live squirrel grenade directly into your police car.
I heard screams. They weren't mine...
I managed to get the big motorcycle under directional control and dropped the front wheel to the ground. I then used maximum braking and skidded to a stop in a cloud of tire smoke at the stop sign at a busy cross street.
I would have returned to fess up (and to get my glove back). I really would have. Really. But for two things. First, the cops did not seem interested or the slightest bit concerned about me at the moment. One of them was on his back in the front yard of the house they had been parked in front of and was rapidly crabbing backwards away from the patrol car. The other was standing in the street and was training a riot shotgun on the police cruiser.
So the cops were not interested in me. They often insist to let the professionals handle it anyway. That was one thing. The other? Well, I swear I could see the squirrel, standing in the back window of the patrol car among shredded and flying pieces of foam and upholstery, and shaking his little fist at me. I think he was shooting me the finger.
That is one dangerous squirrel. And now he has a patrol car.
I took a deep breath, turned on my turn-signal, made an easy right turn, and sedately left the neighborhood.
As for my easy and slow drive home? Screw it. Faced with a choice of 80mph cars and inattentive drivers, or the evil, demonic, attack squirrel of death...I'll take my chances with the freeway. Every time.
And I'll buy myself a new pair of gloves.
CUAgain,
Daniel Meyer0 -
There have been times I've had to swerve 3 times to hit a squirrel [8D] 0 -
If it's smaller than a cow and NOT a person in the road of my vehicle, to bad, so sad, DRT. There will be blood and hair on my vehicle. 0
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